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The beginnings of this post originate in a previous topic....
1.cut aluminum with a scroll saw or skil saw wearing shorts....no ear protection... no eye protection 2.weld with no shirt on 3.run an acetylene torch wearing loafers n no sox.(hot slag will melt earwax pretty fast too) 4.think for one second that an exacto knife is harmless.... 5.under estimate the power of paper to cutcha..... 6.hold a spirits soaked quill in yer teeth...handle protruding out one corner of yer mouth on a windy day and try to lite a cigarette that occupies the opposite corner......all the while thinkin...no way will the fire jump THAT far!!!!!! 7. paint a name on a boat ...boat in water.. painter in canoe....painter gots hangover from hell 8.save a lil time on site at your favorite clients shop....dont put the overhead all the way up.. the truck aint THAT tall.... 9.Use a radial arm saw to rip a board......when ya turn the head 90 degrees...(wanna see holes in wall picher?) 10.make your shop slogan..."I give quotes on the phone!!!" 11.think that green wire on a lite up box is a waste of time....sure its gonna rain that day! 12.use about 3 gallons of acetone that somebody gave you as a gift....to clean the grease offa antique car yer workin on....sop it all up with paper towels....throw the towels in a trash can under your bench. then run a grinder and shoot all the sparks into the can...thinkin..hell no...no way will this lite up and blow the bench right off the wall
Forget to mark dates on calander and drive 2.5 hours to someone's house a week early... but get a great meal out it...
Sell him a used large format printer with the assurance that it is "as good as new"...
Loosen up a lid on a brand new can of fire red lettering enamel, set it on the paint bench with the lid slightly sealed, wait for an unknowing fellow employee to come and shake the can...
Drvie to a job site and forget your yardstick, thinners, paper towels, sign kit, sign... among other things...
How about selling a client on a huge sign program for his new building... selling him on the idea that prominent signs will help his business ... only to have him stop by your shop and have him point out to you that, after selling him 4K worth of signs, it was amazing that your shop lacked any kind of sign at all... all the while being somewhat unamused...
Having several jobs you designed done by another sign painter who, after you went to his shop to tell him how uncool that was, laugh in your face and ask you "Whatcha gonna do 'bout it?"...
How about your wife getting you an 18" electric clock so you will know what time it is... so you won't be late...
Boy... what a negative thread this is going to be but it sure does feel good to vent! LOL!
See you this coming Tuesday... Hey, at least I remembered to come... sort of!
Have a great one!
-------------------- Bruce Bowers
DrCAS Custom Lettering and Design Saint Cloud, Minnesota
"Things work out best for the people who make the best of the way things work out." - Art Linkletter Posts: 6464 | From: Saint Cloud, Minnesota | Registered: Jun 1999
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Hey Mike, I can relate to #9 today. However my weapon of choice was a table saw & a 4'x8' sheet of acrylic. Yesterday, while trimming off a 1/4", the scrap piece snapped off & shot back at my hand. The damage wasn't too bad. Just a whole lot of blood & a trip to the hospital to clean & fix my thumb. Havin' fun, Checkers
-------------------- a.k.a. Brian Born www.CheckersCustom.com Harrisburg, Pa Work Smart, Play Hard Posts: 3775 | From: Harrisburg, Pa. U.S.A. | Registered: Nov 1998
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You drive an hour to do a really cool window with airbrushed fades, ribbon and shadows all 6' x 12'; unload everything and realize you left the pattern you spent 3 hours making at the shop.
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ok.........I'm getting ready to go to Sign World in Atlantic City. Gonna play in the Bull Pen, carve a dove for Karen Souza's mini billboard (to be donated to Covenant House),Custom sharpen 30 blades for my 4 hour carving workshop etc. Throw every thing in the truck, drive 6 hrs, unload,.....can't find my tool box, with all the blades in it....and all my chisels and gouges....left it home , but nothin blew up or caught fire These senior moments are gettin closer together...
Joe, Makin Chips and Havin Fun! On Mars! If I remember...
-------------------- Joe Cieslowski Connecticut Woodcarvers Gallery P.O.Box 368 East Canaan CT 06024 jcieslowski@snet.net 860-824-0883 Posts: 2345 | From: East Canaan CT 06024 | Registered: Nov 2001
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#39- Saw the hell outta a plywood sheet, creating something crazy, all the while little shavings are working their way under your contact lenses cuz you're too lazy to put on safety glasses like on "Hometime"... #40- An X-acto knife invarably falls point-down on your bare foot... That's all I can think of, my contacts are kinda scratchy and my toe is thumping... Love- JILL
-------------------- That is like a Mr. Potato Head with all the pieces in the wrong place. -Russ McMullin Posts: 8834 | From: Butler, PA, USA | Registered: Jan 2001
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steve you need the router a woodworking friend of mine has......its made in germany, cost plenty, but he showed it to me.....sat it on the table, turned switch to ON, then pluged it into outlet.....motor took off went to full speed and the router never moved!!!!!!!!! was at the top of a 12' ladder, you know those ones that have the joints? well i guess the ladder is rated for 200lb, cause i was 230 then, and i got a brush in my left hand, paint in my right, and this piece of crap ladder decides to come apart at one of those movable joints!!!! luckly i had the guy move all the cars(used car dealer)from under that sign, so i wouldnt get paint on em!!! i feel the ladder give and buckle, knowing i dont want my legs to into the rungs i kick the ladder away from me, yep iam goin down!!! did some gymnastics when i was in the service, so i know iam gona hit the ground hard, i tucked my head into chest, same with arms and legs, when i hit on my back, i kicked myself into a backward roll and the momentum of the fall was directed into the rolling over and i wound up standing up on my feet!!!!!!!!!! in typical used car salesman behaviour...the guy looks at me and says, " CAN YOU DO THAT AGAIN?????" it was his ladder, i told him where he could put that ladder and cleaned up my brushes and went home!!!! hurt for a couple days.....but no real damage. but i sure hate workin on ladders!!!!!!!
-------------------- joe pribish-A SIGN MINT 2811 longleaf Dr. pensacola, fl 32526 850-637-1519 BEWARE THE TRUTH.....YOU MAY NOT LIKE WHAT YOU FIND Posts: 11582 | From: pensacola, fl. usa | Registered: Nov 1998
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2) lay your arm or hand against the metal backer while you are pouncing with an electro-pounce.
3) and I will second the one about ripping a board on a radial arm saw.....dont think I have done that since the time a piece of wood went flying across the shop like an F-16. I STRONGLY SUGGEST NOT DOING THIS. If that piece of wood had hit me I doubt I would be typing this now.
-------------------- Ricky Simpson Simpson Signs South Central VA, USA "railroader aspiring to be fulltime SignArtist." Posts: 246 | From: VA | Registered: Jan 2000
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How about this - Hire the sign guy to paint a name on the back of your boat, haggle him down on price by saying you will remove the old vinyl and paint from the boat before he gets there, talk him into doing it on Father's Day, then go out and get drunk the night before. When the sign guy calls you for directions, send him on a wild goose chase because you are too hung over to talk, then, when he finally makes it to your house, watch the look on his face when he realizes you never took the old crap off the back of the boat! (Can you guess what kind of day I had today??????)
-------------------- Ben Sherr Street Metal Custom Auto Art 3006 River Rd Hopewell, Va 23860 (804)452-1540 Bjay65@msn.com Posts: 77 | From: Hopewell, Virginia | Registered: Mar 2002
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DrCAS Custom Lettering and Design Saint Cloud, Minnesota
"Things work out best for the people who make the best of the way things work out." - Art Linkletter Posts: 6464 | From: Saint Cloud, Minnesota | Registered: Jun 1999
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Do like I did today, a customer was coming over and my shop was a little smelly so I was gonna spray some air freshener, I accidentally picked up a can of Raid and went to sparyin', thought to myself man that is one crappy fragrence. This really happend, duhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
-------------------- John Thompson JTT Graphics "The big guy with a little sign shop!" Royston/Hartwell Georgia jtt101@hotmail.com Posts: 626 | From: Royston Georgia | Registered: Feb 2002
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Use a table saw. Oh, yeah - FIRST drink some beer. A LOT of it! Then you can count on your fingers IN FRACTIONS!
Work in a print shop for three years until catching little dropped items with your foot becomes 2nd nature to you. An automatic response. Then change careers so you will use (and drop) Xacto knives all the time.
Back pockets & paint thinner rags. They go together, but WHY? WHY??!
Work in a shop with a Pounce Master Senior and TWO, not just one, Practical Jokers.
Posts: 1859 | From: / | Registered: Nov 1998
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Call him on the phone and tell him (or her) that you have twenty trucks to letter, expense is no problem, you want all the frills, pinstriping, etc., but you gotta start on them tomorrow. Hey, no problem, we sign people love doing trucks! Tomorrow comes and a guy walks in with twenty 1/18th scale semis cleaned and ready to letter. Hmmmm...., and I thought I had that down payment on a Harley.....
-------------------- Maker of fine signs and other creative stuff. Located at 109 N. Cumberland ave. Harlan, Ky. 40831 606-837-0242 Posts: 4172 | From: Ages-Brookside, Ky. Up the Holler... | Registered: Jul 1999
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Stand on a five gallon bucket and (all of a suddenlike) switch positions fron vertical to horizontal in a split nanosecond. Read Mike Stevens' "Mastering Layout" while arm in a cast for six weeks.
Make spray-stencils out of fiberglas sheets and use superglue to splice pieces together. Glue finger to large piece of fiberglas. Holler for help......Wife comes.....laughs.
[ June 17, 2002, 12:08 PM: Message edited by: Wayne Webb ]
-------------------- Wayne Webb Webb Signworks Chipley, FL 850.638.9329 wayne@webbsignworks.com Posts: 7405 | From: Chipley,Florida,United States | Registered: Oct 1999
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Was drawing a design with a mechanical pencil and cutting some mask film on the same design so I was using both a mechanical pencil and an Xacto knife in one hand. I had to draw a line, & not paying attention to what I was doing, I proceeded to push down on the mechanical pencil to let some lead out. Well...it wasn't my mechanical pencil. I had my Xacto with a new blade pointing straight up. It went almost all the way through my thumb. OUCH.
Also, I have a friend who I used to work with who put his hands in his pant pockets and without flinching, without any expression, said, "I'll see you guys later, I have to go to the hospital now." He had an Xacto knife pointing up in his pocket with the blade cover on it. The cover apparently came off and forgeting that he had it in his pocket, he put his hands in his pocket and the blade went up between his fingers and into the part between your fingers that's kinda webbed. OUCH.
-------------------- John Cordova Gitano Design Studio Albuquerque, NM Posts: 268 | From: Albuquerque, New Mexico, USA | Registered: Nov 1998
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