To many of us speaking words of appreciation and love face-to-face is difficult and we usually put it off or make the statement, "Well, they know how I feel about them." Maybe they don't...and, besides, it surely is nice to hear.

When my Dad died at age 80 it was not a sad occassion because he had suffered so much, but it was made so much less traumatic because we had many heart-to-heart conversations in which I had told him of my love for him and how much I had appreciated all that he had done. My Mother is now 87 and she has no doubts about how I feel about her, because I have expressed it to her many times.

I've been to too many funerals and saw the tragedy of people trying to turn back the clock.

I've said all that to say this: Take the time to write a note or make a phone call or visit. It will make the day of the receiver and brighten your day as well. From experience I've been both and either way it is a good feeling.

As you get older the number of funerals you attend increases. I've had the unhappy experience of standing by a coffin and wishing I had told the person how much I appreciated them and just never got around to it. It is an empty feeling. And I've also experienced just the opposite and had no regrets.

Thanks for the reminder.

[ November 17, 2001: Message edited by: Rick Sacks ]

Awhile back,I seperated from my husband for a year, partly cause I couldn't take the added burden of our every day problems with the fight to live...but also, because I didn't want him to have to deal with my dying off.

A year went by and I got worse, and he still wanted to be my husband, despite what I was adding to the cons list with my health, or should I say, lack of it. Just knowing that he REALLY cared for me, despite everythiong else, really made a difference. I'm vertical-ish again.

And on those days when I argue with myself about why I should take my next breath, it's not such a bad thing. As a matter of fact, those days are now few and far between. Now, I can tell him when I get scared or discouraged and I can't tell you how nice it is to have him comfort me and give me strength.

I'm pasting the "comments" he submitted on my website, just so you can see how much he cares.

address_line1: same as yours

phone: ditto

comments: just wanted to say how proud i am of you for having the initiative to put up with the learning curve for building a web site. it looks good so far, and i know that it will look spectacular when you get finished with it. i love you.

I didn't see that one coming, but it sure made my day!

Thank you Ray, I was just passin around an email I had received that brought this lesson home, the smallest kind word or gesture can produce the biggest miracles.

I hope all of you know how much I appreciate you and the kind words and Laughter we've shared! It's been good medicine for me!

This was passed on to me by a friend. It is a sweet morality tale worth
some
thought in todays uncertain world:

One day, when I was a freshman in high school, I saw a kid from my class was
walking home from school. His name was Kyle. It looked like he was carrying
all of his books. I thought to myself, "Why would anyone bring home all his
books on a Friday? He must really be a nerd."

I had quite a weekend planned (parties and a football game with my friends
tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged my shoulders and went on. As I was
walking, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him. They ran at him, knocking
all his books out of his arms and tripping him so he landed in the dirt. His
glasses went flying, and I saw them land in the grass about ten feet from
him. He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes.

My heart went out to him. So, I jogged over to him and as he crawled around
looking for his glasses, and I saw a tear in his eye. As I handed him his
glasses, I said, "Those guys are jerks. They really should get lives." He
looked at me and said, "Hey thanks!" There was a big smile on his face. It
was one of those smiles that showed real gratitude. I helped him pick up his
books, and asked him where he lived. As it turned out, he lived near me, so
I asked him why I had never seen him before. He said he had gone to private
school before now.

I would have never hung out with a private school kid before. We talked all
the way home, and I carried some of his books. He turned out to be a pretty
cool kid. I asked him if he wanted to play a little football with my
friends. He said yes. We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know
Kyle, the more I liked him, and my friends thought the same of him.

Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books again.
I stopped him and said, "Boy, you are gonna really build some serious
muscles with this pile of books everyday!" He just laughed and handed me
half the books.

Over the next four years, Kyle and I became best friends. When we were
seniors, we began to think about college. Kyle decided on Georgetown, and I
was going to Duke. I knew that we would always be friends, that the miles
would never be a problem. He was going to be a doctor, and I was going for
business on a football scholarship.

Kyle was valedictorian of our class. I teased him all the time about being a
nerd. He had to prepare a speech or graduation. I was so glad it wasn't me
having to get up there and speak. Graduation day, I saw Kyle. He looked
great. He was one of those guys that really found himself during high
school. He filled out and actually looked good in glasses.

He had more dates than I had and all the girls loved him. Boy, sometimes I
was jealous. Today was one of those days. I could see that he was nervous
about his speech. So, I smacked him on the back and said, "Hey, big guy,
you'll be great!" He looked at me with one of those looks (the really
grateful one) and smiled. "Thanks," he said.

As he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began. "Graduation is a
time to thank those who helped you make it through those tough years. Your
parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach...but mostly your
friends. I am here to tell all of you that being a friend to someone is the
best gift you can give them. I am going to tell you a story."

I just looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the story of the first
day we met. He had planned to kill himself over the weekend. He talked of
how he had cleaned out his locker so his Mom wouldn't have to do it later
and was carrying his stuff home.

He looked hard at me and gave me a little smile. "Thankfully, I was saved.
My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable." I heard the gasp go through
the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest
moment. I saw his Mom and dad looking at me and smiling that same grateful
smile. Not until that moment did I realize it's depth.

Never underestimate the power of your actions. With one small gesture you
can change a person's life. For better or for worse.

God puts us all in each other's lives to impact one another in some way.

Look for God in others.

You now have two choices, you can:
1) Pass this on to your friends or
2) Delete it and act like it didn't touch your heart.

As you can see, I took choice number 1. "Friends are angels who lift us to
our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly."

There is no beginning or end. Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is mystery.
Today is a gift.

It's National Friendship Week. Show your friends how much you care.

I knew you were one of my heroes for a reason. Thank you... and keep the faith!

[ November 18, 2001: Message edited by: Mark Smith ]

A person who is a lot smarter than me once said, "Be careful how you treat people because more than likely everyone you meet is carrying a heavy load."

I'm convinced that the most miserable people in the world are the ones who are wrapped up in themselves. And the happiest, most positive folks seem to be those who are always giving to others. Thanks to all of you here on the BB who conistently give of your time to help others. It's a great example to the rest of us.

Whenever I try to help someone else it always makes me feel better. Now, what better pay could you have than that?

Recently this theory was brought home to me when I was fortunate enough to spend a day while I was in Chicago with two great friends, Gary Anderson and Jay Allen. Both drove some long distances to come to where I was doing a seminar. They took their weekend to show me around Oak Park and the homes of Frank Lloyd Wright. Those kinds of gifts cannot be put into boxes but they are some of my most precious possessions. My expressions of gratitude to them fail to really express how thankful I am to have so many special friends in this business.

Someday in the future if we meet in person, don't be surprised if I get teary-eyed trying to tell you what you mean to me.

[ November 19, 2001: Message edited by: Raymond Chapman ]

After reading that post and the ones after it, I must say that I was a little surprised at the depth my Dad reached. I was really moved at the feelings that he displayed. As well, it made me think. I have a brand new respect for my Dad, and I am proud to call him that. I must tell the truth, though. I don't tell either of my parents that I love them very often, or that I am thankfull for the things they have done for me. For this I am truly sorry. We can't change the past, but we can use the knowledge of our mistakes to try and make the future just a little bit brighter for our loved ones. I know that all this might sound a little corny, but i have never really been able to express my thoughts and feelings in any manner.

I hope no one is upset that someone that isn't actually in the sign business posted, but I had to at least try to express my feelings, if not in person than in here.(Although I will check back to see if anyone actually read this, lol)

By the way Dad.....I found you, lol

Your Dad is a remarkable guy. I had the honor of meeting him several years back at Atlantic City - and look forward to seeing him again next week. After reading about him in SignCraft - I had it in my mind that this guy, being one of the best in the business, would have an huge ego - and would barely want to listen to anything I'd have to say. Then we actually sat down and talked, and he was so down to earth, and easy to talk to. My "hero" was just a "regular" guy (well almost!).

Your Dad's message is this post is an important one - one that I've tried to live by since my own father died a year ago.

I don't have many regrets of things I should have said or done - but certainly there's a few things I might have done differently. Cancer claimed his life at the young age of 57 - in four short months - and I had thought we we're going to have more time together.

Since his death, I've found myself trying to live a little more for the moment, and making sure I take the time to spend with those that are important to me. And to let those people know how I feel for them.

We don't know how much time we're all given here. In hindsight, if I had known how short the time was he had here, I would have spent it differently. Cherish the time you have, and be thankful for it.

You're Dad has inspired many of us, myself included, to be better artists. While that's honorable, more importantly, he's certainly inspired some of us as well to be better people. That's noble.

The only character flaw I can see, is that he uses PC's - not Macs. Hey, we can't be perfect.

Give your old man a hug - he's a great guy.

An admirer -

Dan Antonelli

[ November 21, 2001: Message edited by: Dan Antonelli ]

Jesus said that a man is not without honor except in his own country, so it is especially heart warming to hear words of appreciation from those that are closest to you. And those are the ones to whom we usually leave things unsaid.

Steven is our youngest at 25 and just moved back to Texas from Idaho. I think the winter weather was just too much for someone who grew up in Texas.

What a treat to hear from a son. And probably like so many other parents, I was rather generous in pointing out short-comings, whereas the compliments and expressions of love were not as plentiful as they should have been. It's sad that we have to learn life's lessons the hard way rather than listening to those who provide wisdom on a daily basis. Now as I am growing older I remember the suggestions given to me as a young pup but failed to really see the insight that was so valuable.

I guess the lesson to us all is to love the present and share that with everyone we meet. Don't wait until it is too late.

Oh, and by the way, son - I love you, too.