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Then, there was the wife who entered her husband's name in a Playgirl "talent search" audition. She told them that her hubby would make a "perfect Mr. February centrefold...since that's the shortest month of the year." Women can be sooo cruel.
-------------------- Ken Henry Henry & Henry Signs London, Ontario Canada (519) 439-1881 e-mail: kjmlhenry@rogers.com
Why do I get all those on-line offers to sell me Viagara, when the only thing hardening is my arteries ? Posts: 2689 | From: London,Ontario, Canada | Registered: Feb 1999
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And let's not forget that poor limbless man lying in that pile of leaves! Poor Russell!
A piece of rope comes into a bar. The BT says we don't serve your kind. The rope goes out, ties himself into a knot, scruffs his head on the concrete and goes back in. Hey! Didn't I just throw you outta here? No, says the rope... I'm a frayed knot!
-------------------- Mark Rogan The Great Barrington Sign Company 2 Stilwell Street, Great Barrington, MA 01230 mark@gbsignco.com
"Sometimes I think my head is so big because it is so full of fonts" Posts: 332 | From: Great Barrington, MA | Registered: Mar 2003
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How do you get an elephant into the trunk of your car?
Well, first you get a Safeway bag, and you cut the 'F' out of 'SAFE', then you cut the 'F' out of 'WAY'...
(there is no 'F' in 'WAY' ......)
-------------------- "Are we having fun yet?" Peter Schuttinga DZines Sign Studio 1617 Millstream rd Victoria BC V9B-6G4 Posts: 521 | From: Victoria BC | Registered: Mar 2002
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Mr. Mouse (the biggest stud in the animal kingdom) and Ms. Elephant (the most desireable babe in the animal kingdom) checked into a motel for a night of mad passionate sex. In the morning, Mr. Mouse leaned over only to descover Ms. Elephant laying dead next to him. He said, "Damn, one night of passion -- now I'm going to have to spend the rest of my life digging a grave!!!!!!!!!!!"
-------------------- Bill Diaz Diaz Sign Art Pontiac IL www.diazsignart.com Posts: 2111 | From: Pontiac, IL | Registered: Dec 2001
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Do you know where you find a dog with no legs????
Right where you left him.
-------------------- Robert M. Kistler South Bend Screen Process, Inc. 2018 S. Franklin St. South Bend IN 46613 Posts: 131 | From: South Bend Indiana | Registered: Jul 2003
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Difference between a Scotsman & The Rolling Stones?
The Rolling Stones say, "Hey you, get off of my cloud!" and a Scotsman says, "Hey McCloud! Get off of my ewe!"
-------------------- John Cordova Gitano Design Studio Albuquerque, NM Posts: 268 | From: Albuquerque, New Mexico, USA | Registered: Nov 1998
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Whats black & green has 6 legs and if it fell out of a tree and hit you it would kill you? A Snooker table. - How do you confuse an Irishman show him 4 shovels and tell him to take his pick - How do you keep an idiot in suspence?.......I'll tell you later!
-------------------- Steve Broughton Alpha Grafix Signs Lowfields Road Benington, Boston Lincolnshire, England Posts: 315 | From: Boston, Lincolnshire, England | Registered: Aug 2001
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What's red & green and goes a thousand miles an hour? A frog in a blender.
-------------------- Jane Diaz Diaz Sign Art 628 W. Lincoln Ave. Pontiac, Il. 61764 815-844-7024 www.diazsignart.com Posts: 4102 | From: Pontiac, IL USA | Registered: Feb 1999
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