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One of my clients is near a non-ferous metal recycler. If anybody does bring in any iron, it goes in a dumpster outside. I often pull out a piece of steel, which they sell me for 13c a lb. It's great stuff for redneck welding projects.
A couple of weeks ago, I was by there and noticed a huge floor jack in there. You know the gigantic ones the tire stores use. I thought, man I could have it cheap, then rebuild it. So I got it out, it was 160 lbs @ 13c per, came out to about 20 bucks. Turns out it works, doesn't need to be rebuilt. Why someone would throw something out that works, I don't understand. It's not made in China model.
Anyway, I was starting to build my spray booth today. My brother in law was helping. He was positioning a piece of wood into place with a hammer. The hammer didn't have enough weight, so I suggested getting a 10 foot running start with the floor jack and ramming the wood, after all, the thing is like an anvil on wheels. He got a laugh out of the idea.
It was then I realized that if used in a pulling action, it would also make an excelent dent puller! Just be sure the vehicle isn't on jack stands, or it would REALLY qualify for "stoopid redneck tricks."
-------------------- James Donahue Donahue Sign Arts 1851 E. Union Valley Rd. Seymour TN. (865) 577-3365 brushman@nxs.net
Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what's for lunch, Benjamin Franklin Posts: 2057 | From: 1033 W. Union Valley Rd. | Registered: Feb 2003
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I have one of dem are thangs. It makes a sooper dooper heavy dooty dolly too! It raises high enough to throw a cushion on it and use it for a stool while paintin' or sandin'. Thank I might be a redneck?
-------------------- Kathy Joiner River Road Graphics 41628 River Road Ponchatoula, La.70454
Old enough to know better...Too young to resist. Posts: 1891 | From: Ponchatoula, LA | Registered: Nov 2000
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Yes Kathy, you might be a redneck. Maybe someone could start a redneck contest. "The most redneck thing I ever did was...
But what would the prize be?
I just remembered a freind of mine. He kind of took me under his wing, and taught me outdoor stuff, since my dad left when I was 13.
He told me about a contest he and his freinds would have. Maybe fiction, but from him, quite believeable.
It was called the "car-blow-up-contest". No bombs. The contestants would all gather in a feild, each one would bring an old car or truck that still had a running motor. They would all first have to pay a certain amount of money into a common fund. Then each one would guess how long it would take his vehicle's motor to "blow". Finally each vehicle was started, a wooden stick was put between the seat and the accelerator pedal, and the engine would run full-out 'till it ceased functioning.
The person who guessed closest to the actual time was the "winner", and got the collected money.
Now I'll take a break from making you people culturally enlightened, and go practice pinstriping.
-------------------- James Donahue Donahue Sign Arts 1851 E. Union Valley Rd. Seymour TN. (865) 577-3365 brushman@nxs.net
Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what's for lunch, Benjamin Franklin Posts: 2057 | From: 1033 W. Union Valley Rd. | Registered: Feb 2003
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Jimbo, I practiced pinstriping this morning for 45 minutes, price: $150.
Got 2 motorhomes in the driveway, one is for parts, a p/u truck, and a suburban both which don't run, a station wagon for sale and my astrovan. The front lawn is tan in color but over a foot high, theres spider webs on the hedges, the apple tree hasn't any apples, been over 105º all month long and can't figure out why I got so much work at this time of my life.
-------------------- HotLines Joey Madden - pinstriping since 1952 'Perfection, its what I look for and what I live for'
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We don't have to mow our lawn. We just run a rope across the driveway from one fenceline to another and then let the horses out. Let them out right after work for 2 days in a row and the lawn is mowed. All I have to do is go around with the pooper scooper.
-------------------- Laura Butler Vision Graphics & Sign 4479 Welch Rd Attica, Mi 48412 Posts: 2855 | From: Attica, Mi, USA | Registered: Nov 2000
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I took and old lawn mower that the engine died on, threw out the engine, mounted a squirrel cage fan on it, now I can move it around easily and position it where ever I need it! I usually put it just under my overhead door when spraying!
Y'all should try it dag gummit!
-------------------- Mike Meyer Sign Painter 189 1st Ave n P.O. Box 3 Mazeppa, Mn 55956
We are not selling, we are staying here in Mazeppa....we cannot re-create what we have here....not in another lifetime! SO Here we are!!!!!!!
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James--just think, now you've got a great jack to help you move---you know, get the wheels back on your trailer and get it down off those durn cinder blocks it's been sittin' on---that's why every redneck needs a floor jack!
I saved a bunch of money by teaching my son to ride my floorjack up and down the sidewalk, instead of having to buy him a scooter. Put a couple of empty Budweiser cases on his head and I didn't have to buy him a helmet neither!...
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The part of the pinchwhell lever on my plotter, which torques the square shaft broke again yesterday. I had already welded the plastc part back together with a soldering iron and a piece of borrowed plastic off a tool box. Couldn't wait for the new part to come in. I started to use baling wire or duct tape on it this time but so far it's holding.
Why would they use PLASTIC on a $2500 machine??
I bopught a huge twin squirrel-cage fan at the scrap heap for $20 scrap-iron price. It has a double v-belt pulley on a 3'' diameter shaft. It's about 3'x3'x8'. Will throw air at hurricane force with a 5horse motor.
-------------------- Wayne Webb Webb Signworks Chipley, FL 850.638.9329 wayne@webbsignworks.com Posts: 7404 | From: Chipley,Florida,United States | Registered: Oct 1999
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You might be a redneck, if half your fans are outside in the yard!
I ain't no redneck, but I heard that Jimmie Martin of bluegrass fame was the ultimate redneck....because he has a Lear jet up on concrete blocks back at the house.
-------------------- Jeff Ogden 8727 NE 68 Terr. Gainesville FL, 32609 Posts: 2138 | From: 8827 NE 68 Terr Gainesville Fl 32609 | Registered: Aug 2002
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You know your a redneck when...... The Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your spouse. You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids. You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws. You think a woman who is "out of your league" bowls on a different night. Jack Daniel makes your list of "Most Admired People." You think Genitalia is an Italian airline. You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean. Anyone in your family ever died right after saying,"Hey, y'all watch this" You've got more than one brother named 'Darryl.' You think that Dom Perignon is a Mafia leader. Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan. You go to your family reunion looking for a date. Your Junior/Senior Prom had Daycare. You think the last words to The Star Spangled Banner are, "Gentlemen, start your engines." You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off its wheels. You had to remove a toothpick for your wedding pictures. The bluebook value of your truck goes up and down, depending on how much gas it has in it. You have to go outside to get something out of the 'fridge. One of your kids was born on a pool table. Your dad walks you to school because you are both in the same grade. You need one more hole punched in your card to get a freebie at the House of Tattoos. You have flowers planted in a bathroom fixture in your front yard. Ya can't get married to yer sweetheart cause there's a law against it. You dated one of your parents' current spouses in high school. You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk. Your school fight song is "Dueling Banjos." Your toilet paper has page numbers on it.
-------------------- “Did you ever stop to think, and forget to start again?” -Winnie the Pooh & A.A. Milne
Kelly Thorson Kel-T-Grafix 801 Main St. Holdfast, SK S0G 2H0 ktg@sasktel.net Posts: 5496 | From: Penzance, Saskatchewan | Registered: May 2002
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Such great responses. There's got to be a prize for the best one. Let's see, how about your choice of a used cutting torch hose, (not too crackly), or an old 3 horse Briggs motor with no carb, (not siezed, I think).
Actually, I wish there was a term more like McGuiver-neck(sp?) for folks that are somewhat self sufficient. "Redneck" carries all the lowly baggage with it.
Still, the timing of Kelly's post was interesting. Just two hours prior, I moved my SECOND chest freezer onto the porch. But it's part of a plan to be scientific. It started when I had four little pigs in a pen together. I thought surely they're too young to reproduce, but wrongo-tongo, they did. Now I've got eight oinkers, certainly more than I need. Normally, butchering was ALWAYS done in the fall, often on Thanksgiving day. Neighbors got together and helped each other do a big job. The air outside was like a 'fridge, hence no bugs and no spoilage.
It can be done in summer, but it's tricky. We butchered one last July, I made a fire nearby, (keeps the bugs away) and most of the work was done by a pro with 28 years experience. He was so fast that I couldn't wrap as fast as he could cut.
Now I'm going to do it on my own, the second one we've done without his help. Here's where the "science" comes in. We can't possibly cut it as fast as he did, so we'll have to chill the meat before final cutting and wrapping. I'm planning to have something like 100 lb of ice in each freezer. If the temp of the ice is down around 20 degreesF, Then it is hoped that I can put the fresh quarters into the freezers, the ice will absorb the heat, and not even get above freezing. Then, with my brother in law's help, we can do the final packaging. He was in the meat business for years, makes beautiful 1" chops.
There you have it folks, the news from the boondocks, where the women are strong and...
-------------------- James Donahue Donahue Sign Arts 1851 E. Union Valley Rd. Seymour TN. (865) 577-3365 brushman@nxs.net
Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what's for lunch, Benjamin Franklin Posts: 2057 | From: 1033 W. Union Valley Rd. | Registered: Feb 2003
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You know that you're a vinyl-slapping Redneck if the Isopropyl Alcohol you use for cleaning your trusty plotter is also known as "Trailer Park Vodka".
-------------------- Ken Henry Henry & Henry Signs London, Ontario Canada (519) 439-1881 e-mail: kjmlhenry@rogers.com
Why do I get all those on-line offers to sell me Viagara, when the only thing hardening is my arteries ? Posts: 2684 | From: London,Ontario, Canada | Registered: Feb 1999
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Ken henry's "trailer park vodka" reminds me of a story that Cam and like minded persons might find interesting.
It was probably 12 or 13 years ago in The People's Republic of California. Once, when I was down and out, somebody gave me a "care" package, with food and stuff in it. When I got more on my feet, I met an elderly Mexican man collecting aluminum cans on the side of the road. I decided to do the same favor to him as had been done for me.
By and by I got to know more about the guy. I never once heard him speak a word of english, but somehow, he was receiving about 600 bucks a month welfare. He was an alchoholic, and so irresponsible that he couldn't handle his money. Turns out there's a program for situations like this, where another person receives the check, made out to the second party, who then cashes it and pays the other persons bills.
The one who was doing this for him was a little old Puerto Rican woman, maybe 75 years old, all of 85 or 90 lb. Not surprisingly, he would threaten her and be abusive, so he could have more money for booze. They asked me if I could take over, and I agreed, to help out the old lady.
This went on for awhile, and the last time I remember seeing him he was drinking cologne to cover up his booze breath. So I came over a week later to pay his rent, and the apt manager says "He's dead". Just like that. No long illness, no one called me, just "He's dead".
Well OK.
I knew I had to get ahold of the people sending the checks, and tell them we don't need them anymore. Turns out it was in some federal building. I went in, there were only 3 people there including myself, but official policy was that you take a number and wait your turn.
And wait.
Finally, the gal working there starts calling numbers. No one's responding. More numbers are called, no one responds. Then I said to the other guys waiting, who seemed oblivious to everything, "Excuse me sir, was that your number she's calling?" Immediatly they jump all over my case, for whatever reason, and my first instinct was to be ticked off, but I know it's not what Jesus would want, so I bite my lip and hold my peace.
Eventually my turn comes. I thought this would be rather simple, after all, there's only one kind of dead as far as I know. I explain the situation to the lady, said here's the remainig money, please take it back. Says she: "Well sir we need his social security number or we can't help you." "Lady his name is on the check, I don't have his number, I've taken time off from my work to do this." "Sorry, we must have a social security number." With the prior incident, and my dislike for this sort of program anyway, I'm losing my cool. "LADY, HE'S DEAD! D-E-A-D! HERE'S THE MONEY, TAKE IT, I'M TRYING TO DO THE RIGHT THING HERE, JUST TAKE THE MONEY!"
"I'm sorry sir we must have his social security number."
I eventually got the number, but as far as I know, I could STILL BE RECEIVING those checks.
-------------------- James Donahue Donahue Sign Arts 1851 E. Union Valley Rd. Seymour TN. (865) 577-3365 brushman@nxs.net
Democracy is two wolves and a lamb voting on what's for lunch, Benjamin Franklin Posts: 2057 | From: 1033 W. Union Valley Rd. | Registered: Feb 2003
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-Why do they call it hamburger helper? it does just fine by it self.
-whats it mean when the drool from your pitbull's mouth is the same length on both sides of its mouth? - it means your trailer is sitting level
- the family car is the one in the yard without numbers painted on the doors
[ August 03, 2003, 11:49 AM: Message edited by: Peter Schuttinga ]
-------------------- "Are we having fun yet?" Peter Schuttinga DZines Sign Studio 1617 Millstream rd Victoria BC V9B-6G4 Posts: 521 | From: Victoria BC | Registered: Mar 2002
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