posted
mark fair and ya all sountherners should get a laugh from this: Boy is this the truth!!!!!
You know you're Italian when:
1. You are 5'4", can bench press 325 pounds, shave twice a day, and still cry when your mother yells at you.
2. You carry your lunch in a produce bag because you can't fit two cappicola sandwiches, 4 oranges, 2 bananas and pizzelles into a regular paper lunch bag.
3. Your mechanic, plumber, electrician, accountant, travel agent and lawyer are all your cousins.
4. For breakfast you dunk a pack of Stella D'Oro "S" cookies in milk.
5. You live in a 900 square foot bungalow, but still have two kitchens. (one in the basement)
6. You have at least 5 cousins living in the same town or on the same street and all five of those cousins are named after your grandfather or grandmother.
A high school diploma and one year of community college has earned you the title of "professore" among your aunts.
8. You are on a first name basis with at least 8 banquet hall owners.
9. You only get one good shave from a disposable razor.
10. If someone in your family grows beyond 5'9" it is presumed his mother had an affair.
11. There are more than 28 people in your bridal party.
12. You netted more than $50,000 on your first communion.
And you REALLY, REALLY know your Italian when:
Your grandfather had a fig tree. You eat Sunday dinner at 2:00 Christmas Eve....only fish. Wear a gold chain, cross, and horn. You have a stupid nickname. Your mom's meatballs are the best. Favorite movies: Godfather/Goodfellas/Bronx Tale/The Last Don/Moonstruck/Scarface You've been hit with a wooden spoon or had a shoe thrown at you. Plastic on the furniture is normal. You know how to pronounce "manicotti" and "mozzarella." You fight over whether it's called "sauce" or "gravy". You've called someone a "mamaluke." You own a pinky ring. And you understand "bada bing"
-------------------- joe pribish-A SIGN MINT 2811 longleaf Dr. pensacola, fl 32526 850-637-1519 BEWARE THE TRUTH.....YOU MAY NOT LIKE WHAT YOU FIND Posts: 11582 | From: pensacola, fl. usa | Registered: Nov 1998
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posted
santo...BA FUN-GOOL!!!!!!!! PIZAN....HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH as for us bein like arabs....we SMELL BETTER, most i-tal-yan men put on way to much after shave....ya ever notice that?
[ May 02, 2003, 01:45 PM: Message edited by: old paint ]
-------------------- joe pribish-A SIGN MINT 2811 longleaf Dr. pensacola, fl 32526 850-637-1519 BEWARE THE TRUTH.....YOU MAY NOT LIKE WHAT YOU FIND Posts: 11582 | From: pensacola, fl. usa | Registered: Nov 1998
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quote: You live in a 900 square foot bungalow, but still have two kitchens. (one in the basement)
When I was growing up in Jersey, everyone had a second kitchen in the basement. They didn't dare use the one upstairs with all the new fancy appliances because it might get dirty!!! God forbid.
-------------------- Kimberly Zanetti Purcell www.amethystProductivity.com Folsom, CA email: Kimberly@AmethystProductivity.com
“Organizing is what you do before you do something, so that when you do it, it is not all mixed up.” AA Milne Posts: 3723 | From: Folsom, CA | Registered: Dec 2001
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posted
I've worked with a few older Italiano's a few years back. Learned a few phrases, none of which would be appropriate in mixed company. You missed out the part where all italian men are gods gift to women (just ask them) If it grows it must be edible... One of these guys could eat raw white onions, just like an apple, or garlic raw, roasted pigeon ( dont aske where from) Sound familiar?? lol
-------------------- "Are we having fun yet?" Peter Schuttinga DZines Sign Studio 1617 Millstream rd Victoria BC V9B-6G4 Posts: 521 | From: Victoria BC | Registered: Mar 2002
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