posted
Just talking on sk*pe with fellow Aussie director of the compan* ... reduced to tears of laughter!
This morning I told Sue I would vacuum m* studio, because last time she sucked up half m* computer cables too. Vacuum cleaner won't suck a skin off a rice pudding! Full bag! New bag eas* fix. Suck m* Letterhead panels of the wall!
Ran it over the ke*board of the laptop to clean out the cigarette ash and sucked out the "WHY"
Lucky it was a new bag and wasn't to hard to find and re-instal "Y"!
Just keeping up your tough standards for directorship Sarge.!
Company moto: We can turn normal in chaos in seconds!
It was like the guy who tried the vacuum cleaner for a cheap BJ .... hard to find yer eyeballs in the dust bag when you suddenly blind!
[ January 31, 2009, 12:58 AM: Message edited by: Jon Butterworth ]
posted
Chaos is easy, now order that's hard!! Wait until I arrive Bushie, chaos on a plane followed by chaos in customs with guaranteed chaos to follow
You thought your company was hardly normal, the only normal I can manage is the setting on the washing machine tehe
-------------------- Anne McDonald 17 Karnak Crescent Russley Christchurch 8042 New Zealand
"I used to be indecisive, now I'm not so sure" Posts: 877 | From: Christchurch | Registered: Sep 2006
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posted
Just make sure yer cell phone works in "Australian" this time, Enn!
Cost me a fortune in parking fees to come and find you, instead of waiting by side airport freeway, getting your call you were thru customs, and picking you up on the drive thru!
You picking to be our Kiwi Director?
But don't cute Kiwi Chicks wait anymore for "jons" in drive thrus?
For benefit of the fellow Aussie director of HNSC who missed another Canadian HNSC director's home by 80 blocks... right road ... wrong end.
Besides driving on right (wrong) side of the road, one handed, using "crutch cam" doesn't help. Lucky he was wearing clean underwear after viewing the video of his trip there thru the Rockies!
Dumb Aussie had the map upside down for "up over"
No wonder too you missed Dan's place in Yarrow ... standing in his driveway taking pics of one of his nice signs across the road and then driving away to find his place. Yer need eyes in the back of yer head up there!
posted
Well, I'm off for an 11 day sea voyage. What could go wrong with stops at Grand Cayman... (I'll set up that offshore account for HNSC ;>) Colombia... (I'll check out our "coffee" source.) Panama... (Institute operation "Van Halen".) Costa Rica... (Jungle Cruise, documented with Crotch Cam,) Cozumel... (Investigate operation "Spanish Fly")
Just pick up plenty of Columbian "Supply" for the "smoko breaks" ,,, dulls the pain a bit!
Offshore Account? Though we agreed it was on "Crash in hand" jobs only split three ways?
You get the better end of the deal cause Ozzie notes are not as big as Canadian, but tear in half more easy for paying employees!
Sarge got "Crotch Cam" Trade Marked" too, Don't think it will make any money down here because it only can be used by left handed drivers ... Us dumb Ozzies drive in the wrong side of the road!
Just watch out for the jungle vines on the cruise ship trip down the Grand Canyon mate! Hate to lose a director hung up in America!
[ February 01, 2009, 12:50 PM: Message edited by: Jon Butterworth ]
posted
Well we made it to Fort Lauderdale and the plane didn't even fall out of the air. I did lose my watch for a bit, then found it again, but nothing really HN. Something's bound to run amuck though.
Sundays from 9am - 2pm I have a market stall selling hand painted panels and hand made leather goods. Three weeks ago I crawled around on the roof which is a very sturdy (haha)arrangement of 2"x3" beams with a sheet on plastic over the top, installing a new sheet of plastic as the old one had holes in which was letting the rain through. Needless to say the whole arrangement sways under my weight and there's not a whole lot to stand on!!
Spring forward to this Sunday just gone, lovely pleasant day, very calm and warm. I had bought the hammer and nails and some battons to go onto the roof as I was aware that the plastic had come loose in two very small spots. I had the ladder in the car all ready for 2pm when I could pack up and do my repairs.
At exactly 1.45pm the weather decided to change to a gale force norwester and my roof plastic turned into a sail that could power the largest Americas cup yachts.
Picture in your mind if you will a 5'3" woman weighing approximately 120 pounds on a ladder in gale force winds wrestling with a sheet of plastic that was trying to turn me into the latest side show catupult at the circus.
Through a great amount of swearing and blood letting I managed to get the plastic secured around a batton at the back of the roof. After getting off the ladder then picking it back up aagain after the wind blew it over and into me I travelled to the front of the stall where I repeated what I'd just performed on the back. I was feeling pretty sore and P*d off by the time I got the front nailed down and after being hit by the ladder again I went back to the back of the stall to attach some horizontal battons.
I'd just nailed down the first when an almighty gust came ripping through and tore the baton off the front of the stall. I went back and forth 12 times wrestling and nailing. I am thinking today that for all my best efforts the sheet of plastic is quite possibly adorning someones front yard.
Murphys law, mother nature KNOWS when you're planning to do roof repairs!!
-------------------- Anne McDonald 17 Karnak Crescent Russley Christchurch 8042 New Zealand
"I used to be indecisive, now I'm not so sure" Posts: 877 | From: Christchurch | Registered: Sep 2006
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I would like to have you join the the "staff" of HNSC. You have pased the entry "teests" several times to my knowledge.
Our Managing Director sets VERY high standards!
NORMALY we have to have a a Director's Meeting to decide ,,,, but at the moment we are worlds apart and one director is on real holidays and another on a mental holiday ,, not sure where other one is!
We definitely need a Kiwi Branch to the International Company! Want a certain Texan to be USA employee but he has yet to prove he qualifies on his own free will.
So I would like to employ you.
Pay is only in laughter and must be shared with others.
Duncan .... print up some more stickers, mate .... I run out antway.
Sarge ... I will introduce our new employee to you soon ... if you can find my place again!
Jamie ... sorry mate, yer still left out in the "COLD" Canada winter on this one! Besides, we don't like employees gettng to close together!
posted
Snow shoes only work on solid water. Liquid water requires skis without holes. Of course, I don't know if anyone from North Calgary has ever seen liquid water.
-------------------- David Harding A Sign of Excellence Carrollton, TX Posts: 5099 | From: Carrollton, TX, USA | Registered: Nov 1998
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Hey Duncan..I'll wave at ya from Progreso when yer in Cozumel!!!
I'd drive over but a 4.5 hr drive there is a bit much!
Enjoy your cruise.
-------------------- Dave Grundy retired in Chelem,Yucatan,Mexico/Hensall,Ontario,Canada 1-519-262-3651 Canada 011-52-1-999-102-2923 Mexico cell 1-226-785-8957 Canada/Mexico home
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Jon, I'm happy to become an employee of HNSC but I decline the offered position of Sexitary.
Remember I'm a woman therefore I make up the rules, thou shalt not at any time know all the rules, ye may know some of the rules at any one time but I have the right to change the rules at any time without notice
-------------------- Anne McDonald 17 Karnak Crescent Russley Christchurch 8042 New Zealand
"I used to be indecisive, now I'm not so sure" Posts: 877 | From: Christchurch | Registered: Sep 2006
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posted
My new sign kit was personally Autographed by Bushie in Moose Jaw....Autographed in Maroon paint. Jon loaded his airbrush with a quart of paint and forgot to lock the pot to the gun....good thing we put drop clothes on the floor.
I can send you eps file logo if you want. just e-mail me.
But Dawgie promised when he returns from holiday he will thaw out his edge and print us all a new batch. Hopefully some heat transfers fot T-shirts too. You might need a blow torch in your te,peratures tho
Talked to Sarge today. Finally found him! Fortunately he took a cell phone and GPS mowing the lawn looking for his Labrador dog!
Not only is HNSC a registered sign company now but he currently building a website for us. Got two domains!
Enn is on the official staff too now, IF A certain Texan submits a application in writing to Sarge, he in as well if he wants. Just has to meet the high standard set and pay conditions.
Jamie. you know the rules about use of HNSC stickers!
Bet yer can't beat the one I put on the back of the drivers seat of a RCMP Cruiser in Moose Jaw While they drove me back to the Motel!
I would have left Canada by the time they found it anyway!
HNSC is a VERY exclusive Company. Very hard to get into. Several other employees worldwide are under investigation ,,,, but one I know alrady said
"I'm crazy ,,, but not enough to work with a bunch like you guys:
[ February 08, 2009, 08:41 AM: Message edited by: Jon Butterworth ]
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I'm happy to be the worst nurse you've ever come across Jon. I don't do bed-pans, faint at the sight of blood and laugh out loud when i see peoples bums hanging out the back of their hospital gowns
I'm fairly average with sticking plasters and tend to tie people up with bandages rather than do anything useful like cover an injury
I'm a total klutz and extremely accident prone so the first aid kit is likely to be empty any time you have a mishap!
BTW: I'm a truly brilliant brush hand
-------------------- Anne McDonald 17 Karnak Crescent Russley Christchurch 8042 New Zealand
"I used to be indecisive, now I'm not so sure" Posts: 877 | From: Christchurch | Registered: Sep 2006
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posted
I don't have any meths Enn. LOTS OF "TURPS" tho! [Only kiwis will understand that slang saying ]
Got plenty lacquor thinners. Burns a bit going down at first, but cures ALL pain, strips ALL the S**t outa the system on the way thru .... but sometimes permanently.
[ February 09, 2009, 06:26 AM: Message edited by: Jon Butterworth ]
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After "LONG" phone call (hell of a distance between here and USA) and costing me $1.20/hour, too. I gave a Texan 60c worth at 3am my "normal" working time, to ask if he would be our USA Sales Rep.
All he gotta do is send aa "brief" e-mail of his experience to Sarge for final approval. Brief as in Sarge has a bad ticker and overload may kill him!
Duncan ... you have met him ... nuff said.
Jamie ... he needs a sign installer with your talents.
Enn ... you may need the whole 50ft roll of duct tape to nurse this guy.
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