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HOW TO DRIVE IN LOS ANGELES > > 1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is L A > > 2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 am to noon. The evening rush hour is from noon to 7:00 pm. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday morning. > > 3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 85 mph. On the 105 or 110, your speed is expected to match the highway number. > Anything less is considered "Wussy". > > 4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. L A has its own version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires go second. However, in Malibu, SUV-driving, cell phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way. > > 5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended, cussed out, and possibly shot. > > 6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can get you shot. > > 7. Road construction is permanent and continuous in all of L A and Orange counties. Detour barrels are moved around for your entertainment pleasure during the middle of the night to make the next day's driving a bit more exciting. > > 8. Watch carefully for road hazards such as drunks, skunks, dogs, cats, barrels, cones, celebs, rubberneckers shredded tires, cell > phoners, deer and other road kill, and the coyotes feeding on any of these items. > > 9. Map quest does not work here, none of the roads are where they say they are or go where they say they do and all the freeway off and on ramps are moved each night. > > 10. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the shoulder immediately to let them know it has been "accidentally activated." > > 11. If you are in the left lane and only driving 70 in a 55-65 mph zone, you are considered a road hazard and will be "flipped off" accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot. > > 12. Do not try to estimate travel time, just leave Monday afternoon for Tuesday appointments, by noon Thursday for Friday and right after church on Sunday for anything on Monday morning. >
-------------------- Dawn Ellis Signs by Dawn Long Beach, CA signsbydawn@aol.com
Trust yourself. Listen to the voice within. It is always right. Posts: 456 | From: Long Beach, California | Registered: Jan 2003
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That strech off of the Long Beach to the 405 up to Western is where I almost said adios and on a sunday afternoon even.
Jack
-------------------- Jack Wills Studio Design Works 1465 E.Hidalgo Circle Nye Beach / Newport, OR Posts: 2914 | From: Rocklin, CA. USA | Registered: Dec 1998
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Don't think of it like regular driving, think of it like your a NASCAR driver. Ya stay just inches away from the guy in front of you. If ya need to pass, just push into the other lane. The person in that lane is also gonna have to make a very quick decision. Move it or lose it. And keep some pint size cans of 1-Shot on the front seat with you. You might have to pitch one at a non-compliant driver. Of couse this can all be accomplished while chowing down a Hollenback burrito from El Tepeyac's.
-------------------- Signs by Alicia Jennings (Mudflap Girl) Tacoma, WA Since 1987 Have Lipstick, will travel. Posts: 3821 | From: Tacoma, WA. U.S.A. | Registered: Dec 1999
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Lol Dawn.. But how fast do i need to go on the 210.. im so confused... I love the fact that im just 2 miles by surface streets from the shop, here.. but tha in itself can be an obsticle course.....
-------------------- sue brown american instant signs pasadena, calif Posts: 90 | From: southern california | Registered: Jul 2006
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-------------------- Ricky Jackson Signs Now 614 Russell Parkway Warner Robins, GA (478) 923-7722 signpimp50@hotmail.com
"If I have seen further it is by standing on the shoulders of giants." Sir Issac Newton Posts: 3528 | From: Warner Robins, GA | Registered: Oct 2004
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