posted October 26, 2006 09:40 AM
The more meets that I go to, the more people that I call or they call me, the more THIS BB becomes more than an electronic family.
Losing a parent is like losing your virginity...it can only happen once in your life. We know that as our parents get older and older, that the time draws closer and closer to getting THAT phone call. Mine came this morning when my youngest (of 3)brothers called to tell me that my oldest brother had called him. Mom was 83, cancer was back for the 2nd time, being a smoker for the first 50+ years of her life, she was on oxygen and in congestive heart failure. Yesterday she was down to 20% oxygen levels in her lungs and had fallen. She was rushed to the hospital and put on moraphine. She went to sleep holding one brother's hand. She died this morning in her sleep.
Her and I were always at odds. I was the only girl with 3 brothers and she wanted a girl to always be able to dress in frills and lace. She got a tomboy that preferred bare feet and corduroys (that was in the 50's), who rode horses and worked like a man.
I hadn't seen her in two years as she lives in Florida. My youngest daughter and family planned on going to see her in March and my husband convinced me that I needed to go see her before it was too late. So I got a super cheap ticket to Florida and was there while my daughter was there. This was a tactical move as I knew that my daughter and family would defleck any nastiness coming my way. Things went much better than expected and I now have a few memories of her and I being able to be together without some viciousness being spewn my way.
The last few months she finally started telling me that she love me but I didn't believe her. She couldn't be trusted. I prayed for her to be able to accept Jesus but she wouldn't give up her horiscope and other things like that.
I know think that it was God that helped her to tell me this everytime. I thank God for this as it will be what I remember most about her in her last days.
-------------------- Laura Butler Vision Graphics & Sign 4479 Welch Rd Attica, Mi 48412 Posts: 2855 | From: Attica, Mi, USA | Registered: Nov 2000
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posted October 26, 2006 09:49 AM
Our sincerest condolences from the St.Maries, Laura. Having lost a Daughter last year I can most definitely empathize wtih you, and it doesn't really ever go away. You're in our prayers.
P
-------------------- Pierre St.Marie Stmariegraphics Kalispell,Mt www.stmariegraphics.com ------------------ Plan on knowing everything before I die and time's running out! Posts: 4223 | From: Kalispell,Mt 59903 | Registered: Mar 2000
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posted October 26, 2006 09:59 AM
Although I may only be an electronic aquentance, my condolences, I know the feeling, I lost my dad when I was 17, I sometimes take my mom for granted but she is now 65 and have gotten a few of the 'mom is in the hospital' calls, (knee replacement aand stuff) but its getting to the point where I know sooner or later (hopefully later) my moms health will start to decline. I feel for you.
-------------------- Ken McTague, Concept Signs 57 Bridge St. (route 107) Salem MA 01970 1-978-745-5800 conceptsign@yahoo.com http://www.pinheadlounge.com/CaptainKen
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"A wise man once said that, or was it a wise guy?" Posts: 2425 | From: Salem, MA | Registered: Apr 1999
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posted October 26, 2006 10:28 AM
Laura, Condolences and prayers from another web only acquaintence (sp).Keep proudly working like a man and riding horses...it's who you are...
-------------------- William "Irish" Holohan Resting...Read "Between Jobs." Marlboro, MA 01752 email: firemap1@aol.com Posts: 1110 | From: Marlboro, MA | Registered: Dec 2001
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posted October 26, 2006 10:28 AM
Lots of sad news in Letterville today! Our deepest sympathy. Losing a parent is always hard, even though you didn't feel that close to her.
-------------------- Jane Diaz Diaz Sign Art 628 W. Lincoln Ave. Pontiac, Il. 61764 815-844-7024 www.diazsignart.com Posts: 4102 | From: Pontiac, IL USA | Registered: Feb 1999
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posted October 26, 2006 10:29 AM
My sincerest condolences, Laura. I hope you will find peace about all the things that happened in the past; that they will stay in the past. I lost my dad to cancer six years ago and my mom is now also 83, but thankfully in fairly good health. May God's blessing be on you and you family.
posted October 26, 2006 11:34 AM
Laura, My own tears meet yours, my dad passed away in May and it still sweeps me at unexpected times. I am so glad you got that visit in. At least there isn't a really negative memory as your last of her.
You have the Father of all fathers to lean on. He won't let you down.
God be with you in this time.
-------------------- Miles Cullinane, Cork, Ireland.
From the sometimes sunny south of Ireland, Posts: 913 | From: Cork, Ireland | Registered: Jul 1999
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posted October 26, 2006 11:34 AM
Our deepest sympathies Laura. Not only for the loss of your mother, but the fact that you really didn't have her through most of your life either. We have a close friend who has gone the last 26 years not speaking to her Mom or Dad or actually any of her family. (3 brothers and a sister) I doubt that it will ever be resolved. My Mother is 79 and we talk almost every day. I can't ever remember having even a simple disagreement with her since I was a kid wanting to do stupid $#!+. I can't imagine going through life without her by my side. I am glad to here that you two smoothed things over towards the end.
-------------------- Dave Utter D-utterguy on chat Sign Designs Beardstown, Il. signdesigns@casscomm.com Posts: 777 | From: beardstown, illinois, usa | Registered: Mar 1999
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""Good judgment comes from experience; and a lot of that comes from bad judgment" - Will Rogers Posts: 3486 | From: Beautiful Newaygo, Michigan | Registered: Mar 2003
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posted October 26, 2006 01:16 PM
Laura, I am so glad you made peace with her. The Lord heard your prayers, too, she is with Him. He is so gracious & loving, & patient with us.
I have a lot of trouble with my own mother. I look JUST like her, & she usually seems to prefer to hang out with their biker friends than us kids. I get ANGRY sometimes, & I have wanted to tell her about it. We ALL want to, just haven't done it yet. But I do love her, & think she loves me too, & all 5 of us kids.
Maybe I will go talk to her. Thank you for sharing Laura, I pray the Lord allows you to feel His peace & love.
-------------------- The Word in Signs Bobbie Rochow Jamestown, PA 16134
724-927-6471
thewordinsigns@alltel.net Posts: 3485 | From: Jamestown, PA 16134 | Registered: Oct 2002
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I'm very sorry to hear of your loss. I'm glad that you and your mother were bridging the gap that separated you. It will be strong comfort at this time. I've always found solace in the scriptures Rick cited.
I lost my mom twelve years ago this month. Not a day goes by that I don't think of her and the spiritual heritage she gave her five children.
-------------------- David Harding A Sign of Excellence Carrollton, TX Posts: 5089 | From: Carrollton, TX, USA | Registered: Nov 1998
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May the Grace of Father God comfort you in these time. Revel in His Glory and remember the fond memories that you and your Mom shared.
Those memories will help reconcile the past with the future and help you through.
Our condolenses to you and yours.
Bruce and Dana
-------------------- Bruce Bowers
DrCAS Custom Lettering and Design Saint Cloud, Minnesota
"Things work out best for the people who make the best of the way things work out." - Art Linkletter Posts: 6451 | From: Saint Cloud, Minnesota | Registered: Jun 1999
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posted October 26, 2006 03:23 PM
Laura, My condolences and Prayers go out to you and your family, Shep'
-------------------- Arvil Shep' Shepherd Art by Shep' -------- " Those who dance are thought to be mad by those who cannot hear the music " Posts: 1281 | From: Mt Airy NC | Registered: Mar 2001
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posted October 26, 2006 03:24 PM
Phil. 4:7 & Eph 2:14. I lost my dad when I was only 25. It was only in the last few months before he died that we started really getting along well. I felt so totally ripped off but I know he is in heaven so that makes is a lot more bearable. It seems very common that a mother will have problems with her daughter and a man will have problems with his son, most of the time. Our prayers are with you Laura.
-------------------- Ricky Jackson Signs Now 614 Russell Parkway Warner Robins, GA (478) 923-7722 signpimp50@hotmail.com
"If I have seen further it is by standing on the shoulders of giants." Sir Issac Newton Posts: 3528 | From: Warner Robins, GA | Registered: Oct 2004
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posted October 26, 2006 03:37 PM
i feel your sorrow.....ive been there with both parents.....but for a little humor might help ...aint none of us gettin outa here ALIVE....))))))))))
-------------------- joe pribish-A SIGN MINT 2811 longleaf Dr. pensacola, fl 32526 850-637-1519 BEWARE THE TRUTH.....YOU MAY NOT LIKE WHAT YOU FIND Posts: 11582 | From: pensacola, fl. usa | Registered: Nov 1998
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posted October 26, 2006 03:53 PM
I am sure you will get as much comfort from all the posts as I did when my wife passed away. We have something very special among the Letterheads.
-------------------- Bill Riedel Riedel Sign Co., Inc. 15 Warren Street Little Ferry, N.J. 07643 billsr@riedelsignco.com Posts: 2953 | From: Little Ferry, New Jersey, USA | Registered: Feb 1999
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posted October 26, 2006 04:33 PM
I appreciate all the kindness that you have shown to me this day. Sharing just lightens the grief.
If all this wasn't enough, I was sitting at my computer at work when my youngest called frantic...wanting me to pray. It seems that she had a horse in on consignment to sell for a friend. A man made an appointment to see it at noon and when he got there he had his trailer. (Always a good sign). They got the horse out of the pasture, took it to his trailer and tacked it up. She turned to lead him and the horse to the outside arena to ride in. It seems the man swung up on the horse, the horse moved and he landed behind the saddle. As he was trying to situate himself the horse gaited off about 50 ft. The horse then gave a buck and the guy landed on the ground.
When Sarah walked over to him, he was down and out of it, gurgling noises were coming from his throat and saliva drooling out of his mouth. She called 911. By the time I got there the police, ambulence and fire dept. were there working on him. They put him in the ambulence and took him, not to our local hospital, but a big trauma hospital in Flint, Mi.
I took her to her computer and had her tell me everything, step by step, word by word, as I typed it into MS Word. My husband has taught me in situations like this, to document everything.
I hope things don't come in 3's.
[ October 26, 2006, 04:38 PM: Message edited by: Laura Butler ]
-------------------- Laura Butler Vision Graphics & Sign 4479 Welch Rd Attica, Mi 48412 Posts: 2855 | From: Attica, Mi, USA | Registered: Nov 2000
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posted October 26, 2006 10:34 PM
Laura, having lost my own mom almost three yrs ago I know how you are feeling . My mom and I didn't always get along, but we made up during her time in hospice. I thank God for that special time with her. I still miss her and wish we had been that close all along. The Lord bless you and comfort you today. Adrienne
posted October 27, 2006 05:06 AM
Laura, My prayers & sympathy are with you. It's been 1 yr, 1 week & 1 day since my Mom died. Relationships can be bumpy; savor all the bumps as well as the smooth sweet spots. They've made you who you are. That looks like a pretty special thing from where I sit. It all so beautifully aggravating that the world just keeps on going, hold on tight. Shalom, Be still, and know that I am God.
-------------------- Bill Dirkes Cornhole Art LLC Bellevue, Ky. Goodnight Mrs. Calabash, wherever you are. Posts: 591 | From: Bellevue,Ky. US | Registered: Aug 1999
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posted October 27, 2006 05:30 AM
Sorry for your loss Laura
-------------------- Frank Magoo, Magoo's-Las Vegas; fmagoo@netzero.com "the only easy day was yesterday" Posts: 2365 | From: Las Vegas, Nv. | Registered: Jun 2003
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posted October 27, 2006 03:20 PM
I'm sorry, Laura. Hang in there.
I just got the call an hour or so ago that my grandmother passed away. I'm glad she is no longer suffering (final stages of Alzheimers, basically in a coma the last month or so), but I'm sure going to miss her.
-------------------- Mike Estep SignCrafters of London 303 E. 4th St London Ky 606 862-0003 signcrafters@alltel.net Posts: 89 | From: London, KY | Registered: Dec 1998
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posted October 27, 2006 04:52 PM
I'm sorry for your loss, Laura. God's Grace is sufficient. May He speak comfort to you in this time and bless you and your family.
-------------------- Wayne Webb Webb Signworks Chipley, FL 850.638.9329 wayne@webbsignworks.com Posts: 7404 | From: Chipley,Florida,United States | Registered: Oct 1999
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posted October 27, 2006 05:16 PM
Oh Laura! I hope the man is all right. So sorry to hear of your loss. I can't help to notice that at least your child can call you to pray. Sounds like you have determined to have good relationships with your kids. I've gone through the loss of both of my adoptive parents this decade. I certainly do miss them. But my birth mother is the one I call when I need prayer. It will be tough when she goes but it will just make me more homesick. Glad you had some good time with your mom. I pray for grace for you...
-------------------- Nancie W. Phillips White Dove Painting Studio 74 Dacula Road, Dacula, GA 30019 678-887-3339
posted October 28, 2006 12:58 AM
Laura, Sorry to hear of your loss. Having lost both parents suddenly, I know how you feel. I pray that God will comfort your during your time of sorrow. Glad you were able to make contact anhd a sort of peace with your mother before the end. Judy
-------------------- Judy Pate Signs By Judy Albany, Georgia USA 229-435-6824
Live simply...Love generously...Care deeply...Speak kindly...Leave the rest to God. Posts: 2621 | From: Albany,GA,USA | Registered: Nov 1998
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My thoughts are with you. Call if I can be of help.
Joe
-------------------- Joe Crumley Norman Sign Company 2200 Research Park Blvd. Norman, OK 73069 Posts: 1428 | From: 2200 Research Park Blvd. | Registered: Sep 2001
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posted October 28, 2006 11:02 AM
Sorry to hear of your loss. This part of life is never easy.
-------------------- Signs by Alicia Jennings (Mudflap Girl) Tacoma, WA Since 1987 Have Lipstick, will travel. Posts: 3816 | From: Tacoma, WA. U.S.A. | Registered: Dec 1999
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