posted
A guy starts a new business...a few months later he’s so busy he decides it’s time to hire a secretary.
Soon business starts dropping off...after a short while he begins contemplating having to let the new girl go.
He walks into the reception area and over hears her telling some one on the phone that their office is closed.
Confused...He asks “Why did you just tell them we’re closed?”
Even more confused as she points at the window...she says “Duuuh...you told me every morning when I get here to turn that sign around...from here you can clearly see it says were closed"
* * * * * * * * * *
A brunette is walking down the train tracks jumping from track to track saying 21...21...21...21...21...21
A blonde comes up and asks what she’s doing?
The brunette doesn’t answer just keeps up with the 21...21...21
The blonde asks again...still no answer so the blonde starts in behind her jumping back and forth saying 21...21...21...21
A train horn blows the brunette jumps off the tracks.
After the train goes by the brunette starts jumping back and forth again 22...22...22...22...22...
Jeff
[ March 03, 2005, 07:46 AM: Message edited by: Jeff Spradling ]
-------------------- Jeff's Lettering Lisa,Luke,Dara, and Jeff Spradling 5742 Shattuck Rd. Belvidere, Il. 61008 815-544-0167
Surviving another day. Posts: 626 | From: Belvidere, IL USA | Registered: Jul 2000
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posted
A female blonde is pulled over for speeding. She is pulled over by a female cop who also happens to be blonde.
The cop asks to see her driver's license. The driver looking through her purse replys "gee I don't remember what it looks like". The cop says it is square with your picture on it.
The blonde pulls out a mirror, looks at it, sees her reflection and asks "is this it?"
The cop takes the mirror, looks at it and says "Oh I see you're a cop too...well just slow down" and lets her on her way.
-------------------- Lee & Paula Iverson United Graphics Sign Co. Kingsford, MI piverson@chartermi.net Posts: 30 | From: Kingsford, MI USA | Registered: Jul 1999
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posted
A blond, wanting to earn some extra money, decided to hire out as a "handy woman" and started canvassing a near by well-to-do neighbourhood. She went to the front door of the first house, and asked if he had any odd jobs for her to do. "Well, I guess I could use someone to paint my porch," he said, "How much will you charge me?" The blonde quickly responded, "How about $50.00?" The man agreed and told her that everything she would need was in the garage. The man's wife, hearing the conversation, said to her husband, "Does she realize that our porch goes all the way around the house?" He responded, "That's a bit cynical isn't it?" The wife replied, "You're right. I'm starting to believe all those "dumb blonde" jokes we've been getting by E-mail lately." A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money. "You're finished already?" the husband asked. "Yes," the blonde replied, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it 2 coats." Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the $50.00 and handed it to her. "And by the way," the blonde added, "it's not a "porch," it's a Lexus."
-------------------- Jane Diaz Diaz Sign Art 628 W. Lincoln Ave. Pontiac, Il. 61764 815-844-7024 www.diazsignart.com Posts: 4102 | From: Pontiac, IL USA | Registered: Feb 1999
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posted
Poor ol' blondes . . .I guess the reason they say 'gentlemen prefer blondes' is because blondes make ANYONE seem smarter . . .
This came in e-mail the other day:
A man is transporting two young chimpanzees to the zoo when his van breaks down. Realizing it will take a little while to repair it, he flags down the first car that comes by. It happens to be . . .a blonde-headed lady.
He says, "Look, my van is broke down and I've gotta get these two chimps to the zoo . . .could you take them please?? I'll give you 50$!"
"Sure!" she replies. The monkeys are placed in the back seat in seat belts and off she goes.
About an hour later the guy gets the van fixed and drives into town and sees the blond walkin' down the street holding hands with a chimp on each side!!
"What are you doing??!!" he cries as he pulls over, "I gave you 50 bucks to take them to the zoo!!!"
The blonde replied, "Well we had money left over so were goin' to the movies!"
-------------------- Signs Sweet Home Alabama
oneshot on chat
"Look like a girl, act like a lady, think like a man, work like a dog" Posts: 5758 | From: "Sweet Home" Alabama | Registered: Mar 2003
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