It is important for men to remember that as women grow older it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as they did when they were younger. When men notice this, they should try not to yell. Let me relate how I handle the situation.
When I chucked my job and took early retirement a year ago, it became necessary for Nancy to get a full-time job both for extra income and for health insurance benefits that we need. She was a trained lab tech when we met thirty some years ago and was fortunate to land a job at the local medical center as a phlebotomist.
It was shortly after she started working at this job that I noticed that she was beginning to show her age. I usually get home from fishing or hunting about the same time she gets home from work. Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says that she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts supper. I try not to yell at her when this happens. Instead, I tell her to take her time. I understand that she is not as young as she used to be. I just tell her to wake me when she finally does get supper on the table.
She used to wash and dry the dishes as soon as we finished eating. It is now not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after supper. I do what I can by reminding her several times each evening that they aren't cleaning themselves. I know she appreciates this, as it does seem to help her get them done before she goes to bed.
Our washer and dryer are in the basement. When she was younger, Nancy used to be able to go up and down the stairs all day and not get tired. Now that she is older she seems to get tired so much more quickly. Sometimes she says she just can't make another trip down those steps. I don't make a big issue of this. As long as she finishes up the laundry the next evening I am willing to overlook it. Not only that, but unless I need something ironed to wear to the Monday's lodge meeting or to Wednesday's or Saturday's poker club or to Tuesday's or Thursday's bowling or something like that, I will tell her to wait until the next evening to do the ironing. This gives her a little more time to do some of those odds and ends things like shampooing the dog, vacuuming, or dusting.
Also, if I have had a really good day fishing, this allows her to gut and scale the fish at a more leisurely pace. Nancy is starting to complain a little occasionally. Not often, mind you, but just enough for me to notice. For example, she will say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour. In spite of her complaining, I continue to try to offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two or even three days. That way she won't have to rush so much. I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her any, if you know what I mean.
When doing simple jobs she seems to think she needs more rest periods than she used to have to take. A couple of weeks ago she said she had to take a break when she was only half finished mowing the yard. I overlook comments like these because I realize it's just age talking. In fact, I try to not embarrass her when she needs these little extra rest breaks. I tell her to fix herself a nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while. I tell her that as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me and take her break by the hammock so she can talk with me until I fall asleep.
I could go on and on, but I think you know where I'm coming from. I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Nancy on a daily basis. I'm not saying that the ability to show this much consideration is easy. Many men will find it difficult. Some will find it impossible. No one knows better than I do how frustrating women can become as they get older. My purpose in writing this is simply to suggest that you make the effort. I realize that achieving the exemplary level of showing consideration I have attained is out of reach for the average man. However guys, even if you just yell at your wife a little less often because of this article, I will consider that writing it was worthwhile.
Posted by Glenn Taylor (Member # 162) on :
Rick,
I hope you have an asbestos suit nearby. You might want to try it on real quick. Posted by Guy H. J. Hilliard (Member # 2529) on :
I only wish that I can aspire to your level of tolerance and compassion. You are truly one of the great ones. Posted by John Lennig (Member # 2455) on :
Ralph Cramden Lives!!! ha!
John / BTG
Posted by cheryl nordby (Member # 1100) on :
One afternoon a man came home from work to find total mayhem in his house. His three children were outside, still in their pajamas, playing in the mud, with empty food boxes and wrappers strewn all around the front yard. The door of his wife's car was open, as was the front door to the house. Proceeding into the entry, he found an even bigger mess. A lamp had been knocked over, and the throw rug was wadded against one wall. In the front room the TV was loudly blaring a cartoon channel, and the family room was strewn with toys and various items of clothing. In the kitchen, dishes filled the sink, breakfast food was spilled on the counter, dog food was spilled on the floor, a broken glass lay under the table, and a small pile of sand was spread by the back door.
He quickly headed up the stairs, stepping over toys and more piles of clothes, looking for his wife. He was worried she may be ill, or that something serious had happened. He found her lounging in the bedroom, still curled in the bed in her pajamas, reading a novel. She looked up at him, smiled, and asked how his day went. He looked at her bewildered and asked," What happened here today?" She again smiled and answered, "You know every day when you come home from work and you ask me what in the world did I do today?" "Yes," was his incredulous reply. She answered, "Well, today I didn't do it." Posted by Bill Preston (Member # 1314) on :
I too bow to one of the greats in the world of compassion and caring.
Of course there is no slowing down on the male side of the family. Perish the thought.
That having been said, I bet I can guess where you WONT be spending the night! I can also guess where you WILL be spending the night. I hope you and the family dog are on good terms. If not, take treats with you.
Posted by Jackson Smart (Member # 187) on :
hahaha. too much Rick!
Good one Cheryl...it's about time women take back thier power! Watch out guys.... Posted by Bill Dirkes (Member # 1000) on :
Rick, You are my HERO. I admire your sign talent, your business acumen, your gracious giving atitude. I will always strive to be like you, especially in these interpersonal relationships. Too funny, Rick
Posted by Bruce Bowers (Member # 892) on :
Dear Rick,
After reading your post, I stood and applauded your compassion and caring attitude.
Then Dana smacked me real hard in the head...
OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!
Thanks a lot.
Posted by Rick Sacks (Member # 379) on :
Many people believe this sarcastic message was written by a woman. I found it so "out there" that I laughed enough to put it on this board. Unfortunatly, one lady I know was offended and claims to actually know women in close to this situation. That I find sad.
Posted by Santo (Member # 411) on :
Boudreaux had been working in the shipyard for years and trapping and fishing at night to bring enough money into the family household. Then one afternoon he came home frome work and his wife, Chleotile annouced, "Boudreaux, pack your bags, I just won the lottery." Boudreaux happily asked, If his wife thought it was better to go to the beach or to the mountains. Chloetile's reply was simply. "IT DON'T MATTER, JUST GET THE HELL OUTTA HERE."
Posted by Randy Campbell (Member # 2675) on :
Hey Rick you can wake up now. Posted by Kimberly Zanetti (Member # 2546) on :
Jackson,
It's not a matter of women taking back their power, we're the ones who have had it all along.
Rick,
You crack me up. As I was reading the post, I thought - thank god I know this guy and know full well he's kidding! Unfortunately, there are men out there like that. Like my grandfather!
Thanks for the laugh!
Posted by cheryl nordby (Member # 1100) on :
right on Kimberly! Posted by FranCisco Vargas (Member # 145) on :
I received two of these jokes in the same half hour, I was busting up laughing! Some men can get away with it, some would not dare even try. My mother happened to drop by and asked what was so funny? So I showed her the email, she sort of laughed and then said she has a friend just like that, then laughed again as she said make me a copy of that so she could show it to her. Then she wants to ask her what advice would she give this woman? (actually a subliminal question) maybe make her snap out of it!
Posted by old paint (Member # 549) on :
hey rick...mines just like that..cept she had a 20' bass boat n' motor when i met her......boy that thing would go......hehehehehehehe
Posted by taurus signcraft (Member # 572) on :
a friend of my mother decided when her hubbie retired that she would too she closed her 'home hair salon' and kicked back
it didnt take long before he asked the big question 'why havent i got any clean shirts to wear to the club'
mrs simply said 'cause you havent washed them'
she then got a peice of white chalk out and proceeded to draw a line down the middle of the house, when he asked what she was doing she told him that since it was half his house too that he should know which half he had to clean!
they agreed that she was better at the washing and ironing, and that he was better at cooking and washing dishes
when she went away on bus trips, she came home to a clean house and likewize when he went on fishing trips he returned to his castle neat as a pin
'their' retirement has been the happiest time of their lives she reconds
i cant wait to retire... i have sooo many things stacked up to do when i have the time!
cheers gail
Posted by Cam Bortz (Member # 55) on :
Hey, Santo, your story reminded me of one that really happened in our town. A friend of a friend worked at EB (the submarine shipyard) and bought lottery tickets every week. He was living with a woman, supporting her and her (not his) two children. Apparently she gave him a hard time about the lottery tickets. One night he won a couple million, and when he told her she started screaming, "O my god, we're rich, we're rich"... he turned slowly, looked at her and said, "Who's 'WE'?", then packed his stuff and left. Two weeks later he was back...you never can tell, can you?
Posted by Wayne Webb (Member # 1124) on :
Put another lawg on the far Cook me up some bacon an' some beans Go out to the car an' change the tar Wash my socks 'n' sew my ol' blue jeans.....
Posted by Steve Burke (Member # 2674) on :
A guy in my building has a sign on his apartment door- Looking for a woman with a boat; Please send picture of boat.
No-one has torn it down yet!!
Posted by AdrienneMorgan (Member # 1046) on :
A certain Alton Gillespie gave me his solution to the toilet seat problem...... And here is mine Posted by Ricky Simpson (Member # 1318) on :
HaHaHaHaHaHa!
Posted by Ben Sherr (Member # 2874) on :
Great post, Rick. I am sure it will be brought up time an time again in the future......most notably at your funeral and your wife's murder trial!
Posted by AdrienneMorgan (Member # 1046) on :
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