...as a bachelor . My fiancé Sara and I will be tying the knot on June 1st, 2002.
I figured I'd give all you heads ample time to get your jabs in before we split for the Emerald Isle.
Gifts and donations graciously accepted, email me for shipping instructions .
Posted by Glenn Taylor (Member # 162) on :
Hey, congratulations!!
Just a word of advice....
She's always right, even when she's wrong. You'll never be able to win no matter what ya do.
Posted by Santo (Member # 411) on :
It's just like joining a very large club, you won't get any recognition or notoriety from joining, just like in married life, so get used to it. Just kidding, congrats.
Posted by John Smith (Member # 1308) on :
hummmmmm .. . . I hope you know that June 1st is the beginning of Hurricane Season ??!!?? (( and, I don't mean just the weather phenomenon, either ))!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Good luck to you and yours ! Posted by Kimberly Zanetti (Member # 2546) on :
Hey Glenn,
'Bout damn time you guys figured that out and accepted it! Only kidding (well, sort of...).
Posted by jimmy chatham (Member # 525) on :
just remember marriage is a 50-50 partnership. you give 50% she takes the other 50%. hehe congratulations
Posted by Bob Burns (Member # 268) on :
MORE ADVICE: WHEN YOU COME HOME FROM A HARD DAY, THE FIRST THING YOU SHOULD SAY TO THE MISSUS IS: "I'M SORRY!"
Posted by Randy Campbell (Member # 2675) on :
congrats.Jon and your lady;Always remember to give her a hug and kiss when coming home or leaving.We never know whats in between that time period.God bless all. Posted by Robert Larkham (Member # 2913) on :
Scientists have found a food that makes women not want to have sex anymore. It's called WEDDING CAKE! Godd luck!
Posted by Janette Balogh (Member # 192) on :
The secret of a happy marraige lies in just three little words. "You're right dear"
Posted by Doug Allan (Member # 2247) on :
Janette, It's about damn time you folks figured that one out! He He - - - - - - - - Opps, what I meant to say was "You're right!"
Posted by Steve Burke (Member # 2674) on :
soon after I got married, my wife said for me to do something and I told her to get lost. I didn't see her for three days!!!...until the swelling went down. HAha.
Just kidding. All the best. Don't listen to the in-laws...
Posted by Bob Burns (Member # 268) on :
Old SignPainter talking to another SignPainter. "It's our 50th Anniversary! On our 25th, I took my wife to Vegas. For our 50th, I'm gonna go back and pick her up!
Posted by Donna in BC (Member # 130) on :
Congrats!
My unasked for advice is simple... just remind her, even in mid argument that you love her. She'll forget what the argument was about. Posted by Felix Marcano (Member # 1833) on :
Sucker!!!! Welcome to the club! congrats!
Posted by cheryl nordby (Member # 1100) on :
>Subject: Words to live by... (short, worth reading) > > >What the Rules of Life really are.... > >1. Never give yourself a haircut after three margaritas. > >2. You need only two tools. WD-40 and duct tape. > >If it doesn't move and it should, use WD-40. > >If it moves and shouldn't, use the tape. > >3. The five most essential words for a healthy, vital relationship "I >apologize" and "You are right." > >4. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them. > >5. When you make a mistake, make amends immediately. > >It's easier to eat crow while it's still warm. > >6. The only really good advice that your mother ever gave you was, "Go! >You might meet somebody!" > >7. If he/she says that you are too good for him/her--believe them. > >8. Learn to pick your battles; ask yourself, 'Will this matter one year >from now? > >How about one month? One week? One day? > >9. Never pass up an opportunity to pee. > >10. If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You have another chance! > >11. Living well really is the best revenge. Being miserable because of a >bad or former relationship just might mean that the other person was >right about you. > >12. Work is good, but it's not that important. > >13. And finally... Be really nice to your friends. > >You never know when you are going to need them to empty your bedpan. >
congratulations BTW!!
Posted by Linda Silver Eagle (Member # 274) on :
Cheryl, LOL! That was great!
Best wishes Jonathon!
Psssst - Don't forget to put the seat down on your honeymoon!
Posted by Rick Sacks (Member # 379) on :
All will go well as long as you remember the rules.
1. The female always makes the rules.
2. The rules are subject to change at any time without prior notification.
3. No male can possibly know all the rules.
4. If the female suspects the male knows all the rules, she must immediately change some or all of the rules.
5. The female is never wrong.
6. If the female is wrong it is because of a flagrant misunderstanding which was a direct result of something the male did or said wrong.
7. If Rule 6 applies, the male must apologize immediately for causing the misunderstanding.
8. The female can change her mind at any given point in time.
9. The male must never change his mind without express written consent from the female.
10. The female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
11. The male must remain calm at all times, unless the female wants him to be angry or upset.
12. The female must under no circumstances let the male know whether or not she wants him to be angry or upset.
13. Any attempt to document these rules could result in severe damage to the relationship.
Congratulations
Posted by Si Allen (Member # 420) on :
The attempt to get the last word...is only the 1st word of the next argument!
NEVER hit a woman....unless you can sleep with one eye open!
[ May 07, 2002, 09:53 PM: Message edited by: Si Allen ]
Posted by Bob Burns (Member # 268) on :
THE OLD COUPLE WERE SITTING ON THE PORCH QUIETLY CELEBRATING THEIR 50th ANNIVERSARY. ALL OF A SUDDEN, THE OLD LADY HAULS OFF AND KNOCKS THE OLD MAN TO THE GROUND! "WHAT'S THAT FOR?"HE WIMPERS. "FOR 50 YEARS OF BAD SEX!" SHE SCOWLS! A FEW MINUTES GO BY, AND THE OLD MAN KNOCKS THE OLD WOMAN RIGHT OUT OF HER ROCKER TO THE FLOOR! "WHAT WAS THAT FOR?" SHE ANGRILY QUESTIONS! THE OLD MAN REPLIES..."FOR KNOWIN' THE DIFFERENCE!"
Posted by Mikes Mischeif (Member # 1744) on :
Congratulations....and may all of your children be born nekid.
My 1st anniversary is next week. Best thing I have ever done. And if an argument does come up, we put on red rubber clown noses and discuss it in the hot tub. It puts every disagreement in perspective.
And now another funny in the same vein as above:
After fifty years of marriage an elderly couple were at the breakfast table on thier 50th anniversary.
The old man leans across the table and kisses his wife. WOW she says, and tells her husband his kisses are still hot.
She says "do you remember the first time we had breakfast together as newlyweds?" I certainly do!" he replied "we were completly naked"
"well" she says, "how about eating breakfast the same way this morning?
"OK" her husband says and they both remove thier clothes.
The woman coo's to her husband "sitting here across from you at the breakfast table still makes my breasts hot and tingly"
"Well sweetheart, Thats because your breasts are sitting in your oatmeal" he replied.
All the best. Mike
Posted by Miles Cullinane (Member # 980) on :
First let me wish you both all the best
next let me ask where in the emerald isle are you heading to? I can suggest some beautiful places to visit. contact me by email and i can offer some thoughts. Ireland does have various kinds of beauty to offer but remember that your wife will always top it all! ( and no i didn't kiss the blarney stone)
Posted by Jonathan Androsky (Member # 2806) on :
Holy crap! 21 replies! Guess I'm in the flaming folder club now, no?
Anyhow, thanks to everyone for the kind words, jokes (well, sorta jokes ) and well wishes.
Miles: I'd appriciate that, thanks. Actually, I'll be happy anywhere so long as I can hoist a pint of Guinness .
Posted by Don Hulsey (Member # 128) on :
Congratulations Jonathan and Sara.
On June 2nd I am sure you will be having a great time as my wife and I are celebrating our 29th anniversary. And we WILL be celebrating, as it has been a very good 29 years.
I wish you both the best.
PS Remember that if you DO put the seat down on the first night, she will expect you to do so forever.heh heh
![[Wink]](wink.gif)
. My fiancé Sara and I will be tying the knot on June 1st, 2002.![[Cool]](cool.gif)
![[Smile]](smile.gif)
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) and well wishes.