A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Hospital...
Back in September, in fact, it was right after the Micro Meet in Petaluma, I had to have a colonoscopy and I was diagnosed with colon cancer. That began a series of ordeals with the various V.A. hospitals to determine just how bad it was and the exact location of the little bugger that was out to bite me in the butt, and what to do about it. Every time I went in I got a different person to talk to and start the saga all over again from the beginning. I got more tests, more prodding and poking with funny looking instruments of destruction in my ears, down my throat and up my ask me no questions I’ll tell you no lies! And more opinions on just how bad the end result would be. No pun intended. And believe me, they’re ALL bad. One thing is for sure -if there was ever any doubt; I’ll never turn gay! The "Intro to Prison Love - 101" was No Fun.
Today (Dec. 28) I went for the long shot and hopped onto the gurney - and when I woke up, expecting to find they’d cut off the wrong leg - lo and behold they ran some more tests while I was napping and found that they couldn’t find anything after all! My cancer must have fallen out on the ground whilst I wasn’t looking and they didn’t have to saw me open a-tall. At least they think so. They DID take a biopsy of a couple discolorations way up in there so I may once again get some bad news in a week or so and have to go in for a nip & tuck but it won’t be scary this time and I know the results will be easy ones to live with.Ta Daaaaaaa Lucky Me! I should have been in Vegas today...
So I’m back home, everything is fine and I’m a Happy Camper once again...let’s get this big weekend started, it’s Beer:30 already!!!
Mike
Posted by Tony Lucero (Member # 1470) on :
Had a similar scare... important to keep in mind that the examinations are uncomfortable...but many of us have to deal with it and I just want to assure anyone out there who is avoiding these important examinations because of all the vivid descriptions you've heard...early detection and treatment is far better than the alternative. I, too had a good diagnosis, which I give thanks to the Lord, and am happy to hear your results are good. Best wishes.
Posted by Glenn Taylor (Member # 162) on :
.....or else Gary will introduce you to Prison Love 201!
Best Wishes!
Posted by Rick Sacks (Member # 379) on :
Mike, Next time bring some tools to wood grain a table top in the waiting room. It'll knock off the nervousness and give them a gift and inspire others watching. Glad you're continuing to be AOK
Posted by cheryl nordby (Member # 1100) on :
Yes glad to hear the great news Mike!!
Posted by VICTORGEORGIOU (Member # 474) on :
Mike, we're really glad you are ok.
I would like to ditto Tony's remarks about regular examinations for men over 50. They are no fun, and it can be scary when a polyp tests positive. But it's a "pay me now or pay me later" thing. Early detection is the only way to go.
Happy New Year! Vic G
Posted by Mike Languein (Member # 319) on :
Thanks, guys and gal...
Glenn that Gary fella sure looks familiar. If I hadn't had my back toward him most of the time and if you put him in scrubs...Yeah, that's the guy that checked me out a couple times. Now that I think back on it it seems I felt 2 hands on my shoulders at the time...Hmmm
..and the bastard never calls!
[ December 29, 2001: Message edited by: Mike Languein ]
Posted by Arvil Shep' Shepherd (Member # 2030) on :
Mike, I am glad you are OK........ Have a Happy New Year... Shep'
Posted by Ken Henry (Member # 598) on :
Glad to hear that all's well health wise Mike. Those examinations really arn't a whole lot of fun, but very necessary. Last time I had one, it resulted in a nightmare where I dreamed that I'd become a hand puppet.
Posted by Jerry Steward (Member # 2420) on :
You know, I hope by the time that's neccessary for me(29), they will have found a marvelously non-intrusive technique; that or else I'm gonna hunt down a slender, petite girl~doc! Yup, but you're doin fine now, that's all that counts. Have a blessed New Year.
Posted by old paint (Member # 549) on :
mike.....you lucked out.....and now would be the time to make changes in your lifestyle. this was a scary situation....and now you need to make a lot of changes in your eating, drinkin and how you take care of that carcass.....i had 3 heart attacks at 42. promted a whole lot of changes, qiut smokin, no sodas, gave up red meats at 1st then went to no fleshes, no fish even and at one point didnt eat any eggs for more then a year. iam 56 now...got more lungs now the when i was 35, heart is like a 20 year old, only problem is my back(which i will need surgrey somday)but will live with most of the pain for now. my sister in law just had the operation....shes now doin some kemo.....but prognoisis is full recover... GLENN....WHERED YOU GET THAT PIC OF MY ..DADDY?
Posted by Jackson Smart (Member # 187) on :
Yes...glad to hear you are having it checked....I hope for the best.
NOW!!!.....ALL you guys out there that are in thier 40's and 50's...Have your Prostate checked!!!!! Trust me...you will be a whole lot happier if you can catch a problem early...and not let it get too far...Ask me...I found out I have prostate cancer earlier this year....and I am still dealing with it. It will certainly get your attention. The test is called a PSA test...a simple blood test.
Early diagnosis is the key to any major illness.
PLEASE!!!!!
Posted by Suelynn Sedor (Member # 442) on :
I'm glad to hear everything turned out well for you Mike. Must have had some sleepless nights.
All the best in the New Year.
Sue
Posted by pierre (Member # 1462) on :
Man........what a trip! Glad it's over. Now just kick back and have another butt light...........I mean a Bud Light. Geez
heh
Posted by Jeffrey Vrstal (Member # 2271) on :
You lucked out, way to go. Interesting how those docs can diagnose one thing and then lose it.
At this end, we were not so lucky. My wife's father passed away on Dec. 23rd after a relatively short bout with cancer. He was 67... earlier this summer he felt as if he "had rocks" in his stomach. After a cat scan, they saw some sort of mass in his abdomen and decided to do a biopsy. It was cancer but what kind and what was the source? Still undetermined after thinking that it might have been testicular and removing one that turned out not to be the source. The cancer grew SO fast. Many folks in the Seattle area lost a great guy and my heart breaks for my wife as she goes through this painful time.
I guess now I will begin to get checked for things... I too hate the thought of all of the prodding but that's what they have to do. The suffering that she's going through now is much greater than a little discomfort that might prevent the same thing from happening to me.
Our chins ARE UP here. Tomorrow promises a better day.
Posted by Si Allen (Member # 420) on :
Hey Mike....glad ya hated the exams!
Would hate to see ya in West Hollywood in Drag!
Posted by Todd Gill (Member # 2569) on :
Mike,
Humor is a big part of dealing with stuff like you went through. You had me laughing to tears through your serious post.
True story: My father-in-law went to the doctor about a year ago for his annual physical. The doctor (who is mine also) broke the ice just prior to his prostate exam by exclaiming (and I quote...) "Ok Richard, bend over and touch your toes and I'll show you where the wild goose goes!" He then rammed his finger to parts unknown.
My father-in-law, who likes to joke too, said "Jeez doc, you gotta a cold nose!"
They had a good laugh.
Glad to hear you're alright.
Posted by Ken Morse (Member # 1799) on :
My Doc told me "if either one of us starts to like this its time to find a new doctor"
Our health is our greatest wealth, glad everything is OK.
Posted by FranCisco Vargas (Member # 145) on :
Yeah I think not only is the way they check you is uncomfortable, but when you get different opinons that you might be on your last rope would be more scarier. Glad to hear things are better for you Mike. Keep up the humor, it's the best medicine.
Posted by Cam Bortz (Member # 55) on :
So the doc thought you had colon cancer. Then he said you didn't. Now he's going to test you again 'cause maybe you do anyway. What a nightmare! Who the hell is your doctor, Lenny's brother?
