My very good friend Jeff Spradling - known to many here - took it upon himself last year (during our Renata Guzman Cancer Fundraiser) to gather money from fellow members of the Boone County Historical Society and buy my autographed pink shorts signed by all the project leaders (from the 1997 International meet in Belvidere).
They are creating a Walldog display in the museum to honor our contribution to the town (how cool is that?!!) and bought the shorts for part of the display. (What a guy Jeff is!!!) Problem is, I can't paint without them. I can't borrow them back for the weekend - so now what?
So, I am in need of some neon pink shorts (not too long or they're 'longs' not shorts) and want to know if anyone has suggestions on how a real man can still get away wearing pink shorts - and where I can get them.
Yes, this is a tongue-in-cheek request - but seriously, what will I paint in now? (Besides showing up with just one eyebrow!!)
I can design my mural (yes, Sawatzk'eh - it is well under way) without them - but I'm not sure if I can paint without them.
HELP!!
Posted by Jane Diaz (Member # 595) on :
Hey, there are some quilters here. Maybe we can make you a quilted pair of shorts!! As I remember those shorts, you could probably look in the overstock underwear, and sew the "flap" shut. Hey, now would be a good time. they are probably trying to get rid of the leftovers from Valentine's day! We love ya, Jay! Hey, you are COLORFUL!
Posted by Mike Pipes (Member # 1573) on :
Do they have to be neon?
Krylon, meet Joe Boxer.
Swim trunks often come in neon colors but considering they're *JUST* now starting to make their way onto store shelves here in the desert, I doubt you'll find many in your neck of the woods. I was actually looking at swim trunks yesterday but there weren't any neon ones. Most were either some sort of island/hibiscus pattern or different colors of camo.
I wear some pretty funky color combinations just for the sake of being a walking eyesore and to really seal the deal, make no mistake I did it intentionally, I pair it up with black sweatsocks and white running shoes. Posted by Sheila Ferrell (Member # 3741) on :
There's this Sheriff in Arizona who can hook you up . . . . .
Posted by Bruce Bowers (Member # 892) on :
LOL, Sheeler...
Posted by Raymond Chapman (Member # 361) on :
Jay - What "real man" did you have in mind that was going to wear those things?
"Are those your legs or are you riding a chicken?"
Posted by Eric Barker (Member # 2972) on :
Jay, I think you should wear these in honor of Dan.
Posted by Dan Sawatzky (Member # 88) on :
Some folks will use just about ANY excuse they can come up with to jam out of a little contest. This is a GOOD one Jay! If you can't handle the pressure just let me know...
You ain't seen nothing yet. I'm not even warmed up.
I'll keep my eyes peeled in our parts for some PINK shorts for ya Jay.
Got the maquette done YET???
-grampa dan
Posted by W. R. Pickett (Member # 3842) on :
...Jay, why can't you just wear a RED THONG like everybody else? Are you trying to be "different" or what?
Posted by Jay Allen (Member # 195) on :
Glad I could invite such funny remarks!!
Mike Pipes, I have a bad vision of my father during the summers of my youth with that description about the black socks and running shoes!!
Eric, if I wore THAT pair of pink shorts people would ask me if I lost a bet.
I missed the joke on the Arizone sheriff - but Ray knows who said that to me about the chicken legs - it was Ricky Jackson.
We still laugh about that one.
The suggestion has been made - and I'll probably be forced to comply - Joe Boxer - meet Krylon!! Thanks, Mike!! I'll just need to sew the flap shut to abide by public decency laws.
Sawatzk'eh, I'm preparing for Lodi - and the shorts are part of it. You're always talking about planning for all the things you need to do - and items you'll need when you work on a project. This is part of the work, man!!!
Maquette? What maquette? Am I supposed to be working on something?
Posted by Jay Allen (Member # 195) on :
Billy, would you be my friend if I ever wore a thong? Red or any other color?
I didn't think so. It's probably hard enough to be nice when I wear those shorts. Posted by Jeff Spradling (Member # 1615) on :
Jay...I bet OP can hook ya up with some speedos
Jeff Posted by Jay Allen (Member # 195) on :
Not after he's had 'em on. They'd be Speedowns.
Posted by Mike Pipes (Member # 1573) on :
Jay,
Sheriff Joe Arpaio dresses Maricopa County inmates in pink boxers and striped coveralls so they cannot be mistaken in the event they break out (not on Arpaio's watch). Sheriff Joe's the man that built "tent city" where inmates stay - in 120 degree heat. He feeds 'em a strict diet of bologna sandwiches and water. In otherwords, his prison actually is a prison, not the swag digs inmates in other areas get to spend their time. This is for the real nasty people only though, lesser offenders get things a bit easier. Sheriff Joe gets a bad rap because of tent city but the flipside is, the man built an animal shelter on top of the regular prison where inmates are taught how to train and provide medical care for animals.
Joe Boxer is a brand name, by the way. Posted by Sheila Ferrell (Member # 3741) on :
He don't get no bad rap from the majority of the right thinking people in the nation. Arpaio is the MAN.
Posted by Tony Segale (Member # 1380) on :
What was I thinking when I gave you the mural containing the historic ultra-conservative "Nort-Dakota Dutchmen" bank? Maybe you can find some day-glo flouresecent green shorts instead to save my face in this home-town. Don't try to trick us into all wearing pink shorts, either. Thick bushy eyebrows, I can dig, but not pink shorts, I don't care if you ever find another pair, we're not wearin' 'em.
On second thought, hurry up and get the gall durn design done and I'll personally go buy you a pair...today!
Posted by Jay Allen (Member # 195) on :
Tony:
SOLD!!!! Put your wife on it. She'll find me some!
I'll be done with my design next week. Maybe. Or the week after. Or..... what month is this?
Is Sawtzk'eh reading this?
Go Sheriff Joe - I like it!! Thanks for letting me in on that. No wonder they love him out there.
Posted by Ricky Jackson (Member # 5082) on :
OMG, the chicken rides again!!! Bwwwwaaaaahahhhhh!!! Posted by Mike Pipes (Member # 1573) on :
Sheila, I get a kick outta Sheriff Joe, I think he's the MAN too but you would not believe how often he's gotta appear on the news to defend himself. Every time the man wipes his butt he's got another liberal group chasing after him for something.
Posted by Dan Sawatzky (Member # 88) on :
If Jay's gonna be wearing BRIGHT pink shorts he will be easy to find when OUR team is finished painting OUR mural and setting out to do some SERIOUS heckling.
THIS is going to be FUN!
-grampa dan
Posted by David Harding (Member # 108) on :
If the team leader wears pink shorts, his crew may be laughing so hard that all the lines will be wiggly.
Posted by Jay Allen (Member # 195) on :
There you go, Sawtzk'eh - if you wear pink shorts then your painters can go pee - and you'll still have the wiggly lines!! You should thank Harding for the suggestion. Maybe you'll have enough help so you can finish right AFTER Gary Anderson's team does.
And about the heckling, did you not read my post about the Fire Dept. at the ready with fire hoses for any and all hecklers? Especially the Can'ehdian painters that heckle? They've already promised me that they'll help out.
I sure hope its hot that weekend because somebody is getting wet. Bring it on, Dan!! Bring it on!! Posted by Jill Marie Welsh (Member # 1912) on :
Try local thrift stores! (Goodwill, Salvation Army, St. Vincent DePaul, etc.) They usually have lotsa dated 1980s wear for sale cheap! Love...Jill Posted by Jay Allen (Member # 195) on :
Jilly, How'd you know I got 'em in the 80's?? Are you psychic? My ex-wife bought them for me - and probably wishes she never had.
Off to the thrift stores . . . .
Posted by Jill Marie Welsh (Member # 1912) on :
No, Darlin, I am from Butler County, where you can still get an occasional glimpse of pink shorts. (with the optional headband/wristbands!) Love....Jill PS Want me to go lookin?
[ February 25, 2006, 09:18 PM: Message edited by: Jill Marie Welsh ]
Posted by DianeBalch (Member # 1301) on :
Jay and Dan, what size do you want?
Diane
Posted by Steve Vigeant (Member # 439) on :
Ya know, I haven't been active on this site for a number of years and I'm ready to return. I've really missed everyone. I've missed a bunch of meets. It's been 2 kids, a house and 6 or 7 years later, and I log on, hoping I'll still be able relate to the scene, and that's when I see the pink shorts post. And I feel like I've never left. I'm thinking Ricky Jackson would appreciate this thread. I wonder if he's still around, and of course he's already chimed in. Like it was yesterday. It feels great to be back. Steve
Posted by Jill Marie Welsh (Member # 1912) on :
...and to think it took a l'il old pair of pink shorts to bring you back, Steve. Love....Jill
Posted by Deri Russell (Member # 119) on :
Well Jay I've been on letterhead here for an hour or two lookin' at the meets and tryin' to decide where I was goin' this year. Now I know. I gotta go to where the pink shorts are gonna be. Its just a given. Geez,you better find some. Deri
Posted by Deb Fowler (Member # 1039) on :
Jay, You should be all set for the 125th anniversary of the city of Belvidere. My brother brought the article over about the murals on the slabs for each of the nine townships; that's going to awesome. Each will be 4 ft by 8 ft depicting a scene from each of the townships; it's going to be awesome.
Posted by Jay Allen (Member # 195) on :
Deri, Lodi is two hours from some of the best scenery in the world. Two hours to everything according to Tony. 2 hours to Yosemite, San Fran, some redwood forests (some further north also), Lake Tahoe, Reno, the Pacific coast, in the heart of the Napa Valley (the biggest reason my wife is going), etc.
So, if you're picking a meet to go to, this would certainly offer more than just painting for the weekend.
Speaking of that, would you help me instead of that other Can'ehdian, Sawatzk'eh? You know he won't let you pee if you work for him? And what about Pat McKillop - get her to come with you and help too!!
Our wall will be the fun wall. Sawtzk'eh will just have a bunch of dancing, knees-together wiggly painters. How happy will they be? (Not at all until they can go potty)
Posted by mike meyer (Member # 542) on :
Here is what he's talking about folks...this is Jay lasy July here in Mazeppa....He is a STUD! This is what you will see in Lodi...scary isn't it? If he pulls them up, he can get um to his chin and then camel toe....oh my god...I can't look!
[ February 27, 2006, 03:47 PM: Message edited by: mike meyer ]
Posted by Jay Allen (Member # 195) on :
Time to lose some weight.
I swear to you I will lose at least 10 of those pounds you see in that picture.
Sorry about the man-boobs. My health got away from me this winter. Too much Capt. Morgan, Almond Joys and caramel rolls.
But you gotta admit, I'm sportin' a real nice tan, dontcha' think? It's the cocoa butter.
Posted by Tony Segale (Member # 1380) on :
From the looks of you, Jay... you better not be traveling to much out here,with that physique you better not rush thru that wall job...Dan, leave him alone
no need to take your wife to Napa..I'll show her where she can experience finer wines right here in Lodi...
in fact, Saturday night of the WallDog Project, there will be a Wine & Art Stroll..featuring 40 wineries of the Lodi Wine Community!
Posted by bill riedel (Member # 607) on :
Pink shorts are not what the average sign painter would wear, but it always so easy to find Jay in Belvedere, it would not have been easier to find him if he was carrying a flag.
Posted by Jill Marie Welsh (Member # 1912) on :
I think Jane should be able to whip up a few pairs if some kind soul donated the pink material.... That would be hilarious to see a walldog crew all clad in pink shorts. Love....Jill
Posted by Linda Silver Eagle (Member # 274) on :
I've got a cute little pair of pink shorts but they are made for a woman LOL.
Jay if nothing else, I could send you these...LOL.
Just watching you try to talk the other heads into them would be a hoot.
Posted by Jay Allen (Member # 195) on :
Hey Jill - you have a great idea going there. All the painters on our wall in pink shorts. What a sight!!
The other notion is that nobody would help me if they had to wear pink shorts.
What to do?
Hey Meyer, if you come out to Lodi, would YOU wear pink shorts too?
Frank? Bill?
Posted by Raymond Chapman (Member # 361) on :
Jay- you know, you could be spending all this time that you are wasting talking about pink shorts in actually doing the layout for your wall.
I really hate to say this, but most of us can tell where Jay is without the aid of pink shorts.
And the shorts don't actually enhance the image all that much.
P.S. Meyer without a shirt is jolting enough - please don't put him in pink shorts. The Wall Dogs have a certain reputation to uphold (small, but there nonetheless) - please don't endanger that with putting Meyer over the edge. You know, most of the folks in California are strict enviornmentalist. Visual pollution is frowned upon.
[ February 28, 2006, 01:29 PM: Message edited by: Raymond Chapman ]
Posted by Tony Segale (Member # 1380) on :
Thank you very much, Raymond.
In my quest to attract people to California, I have to be somewhat polite and diplomatic how I deal with those desiring to pollute the environmant of this great state. Your advise is most appreciated.
Yeh, get 'er done, Jay.
Posted by mike meyer (Member # 542) on :
Jay...I'll wear PINK BIB OVERALLS if ya want me too! Raymond, you can shave logos in my back..I'm just trying to get more substrates to work on! WILL PAINT FOR PINK
Posted by Dan Sawatzky (Member # 88) on :
Hey Mike
If you paint on my team I'll let you wear pink. blue or whatever color you want. AND we get to HECKLE JAY TOO!!!
Then when we are done (and it shouldn't take too long) we can both go and add some wiggly lines to JAY'S mural. By that time he should have his maquette finished and will be desparate for help to paint the mural. He'll be so desparate that he won't be quite as bossy as I hear he can be on occasion (especially when he is stressed).
I KNOW you do a mean wiggly line!!! FREE - SPECIAL EDITION grampa dan's wiggly brush too!
-grampa dan
Posted by Mark Yearwood (Member # 2723) on :
...looks like there will be a need for the Fashion Police Division of the Sign Police.
We're going to need a new logo and some shirts... ummmm.....Mr. Butler?
Posted by Jill Marie Welsh (Member # 1912) on :
Hey if I was there I could re-enact the infamous Best Butt photo contest I did at the Winter Muster.... Nah, something about a guy's bum encased in pink shorts is just not that appealing! (sorry Jay) Love....Jill
Posted by Dan Sawatzky (Member # 88) on :
Seeing how David is also a mural leader in Lodi I suspect he may just be biased in regard to upholding the law in regard to letterhead fashion.... any penalties may just be a stint on HIS wall.
He would do a GREAT logo and shirts though. I'd buy one in a flash!
-grampa dan
Posted by Jay Allen (Member # 195) on :
You didn't hurt my feelings, Jill. I only wear them for painting walls!! I bet I'd be more hesitant than you looking at a guys bum wearing pink shorts!!
Bossy, Dan? Me? I've never been called that before!! Lost of other things - but not that!!
I'm as easy going as I can be. I eat stress for breakfast, as a matter of fact. I just like to take my time and do things right. What's the hurry?
Anybody want to take bets that Gary Anderson's mural is done first? (That would mean BEFORE Dan's) I hear Vegas is offering great odds.
I'll be looking forward to all the help on our low stress, pee-any-time-you-like, non-wiggly line mural if you all get done quickly. It's hard to heckle yourself that way. Thanks in advance for bringing me all the help, Sawatzk'eh!!!!
If you're on the fence about going to HeadWest Walldogs in Lodi, come see how this all turns out!! Will Dan eat crow? Will Gary finish first? Will somebody work all night to straighten Sawatzk'eh's line work on his mural? Will Gov. Schwarzenegger show up on Memorial Day as planned? Will Tony survive all this?
Only those who goes will knows!!
Posted by bill riedel (Member # 607) on :
Jay, I will do all I can to help except wear pink shorts. I hardly ever wear shorts and if I do, they will not be pink. Think about it, if the crew all wore pink shorts, all the gays would be hanging around our mural. No thanks.
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